I was hesitant to make this thread, but here goes. In the last couple of months I have been dealing with some frustrations communicating with a girl I care about. I thought the worst such as maybe she had started dating someone or that she just didn't want to talk anymore. But that was not the case. What she shared with me was that she had been in and out of the hospital. I think something happened to where she felt she may be a danger to herself. Last Monday, she entered a treatment facility for an eating disorder as well as something else I wish not to reveal at this time. It was kind of an odd situation as she wasn't exactly totally inpatient and the reason s because she's a school teacher and they were allowing her to work while she also underwent treatment. She was also able to keep her phone, though it would be monitored as to make sure she isn't on certain sites that may be negative to her recovery. I was worried about texting her as I definitely didn't want to interfere in her recovery. She said I wasn't and I hope that is true. I don't try to talk to her about things that could be distracting like relationship type stuff. I try to find encouraging quotes to send her. After over a month of not being able to talk to her for various reasons like her phone not working and her being the hospital, I was grateful to be able to talk to her, but I was also sad because she is not in a good place. And now, I'm afraid it may have gotten worse. Last Thursday, she told me that she had to go to court in another state due to a speeding ticket that following Friday. She said she was well above the speed limit which is considered a federal offense and can include jail time. I tried to be encouraging, like sending her an inspirational quote as well as praying which I am not good at. Her last message to me was sometime after seven in the morning where she texted that she liked the quote I sent her. Sometime after twelve I had texted her checking to make sure if everything went well. There was no response and so I tried again a few hours later. Still nothing. And later that night one more time before I went to bed. I didn't text at all Saturday and only once today, and still no response. This is making me fear the worst in that she did end up in jail. I was really relieved when she said that her school was understanding of her getting treatment while she still got to teach which is something I know she enjoys doing. And if that's the case, I just fear she will now lose her job because of being in jail. Then there's the possibility that she had her phone taken away and I feel bad as maybe it's because of something I said. Maybe whoever has been monitoring her phone thinks I'm a negative or toxic person. As bad as I would probably feel if that is true, I would at least feel some relief in that at least she was not in jail and everything is okay. Either way, I just really bad and selfish as well. I believe in a higher power and I call that power God. But I have constantly struggled with my faith, in particular when bad things happen. I feel s frustrated that I prayed as best as I could and it seemed to not matter. I'm angry at God, because this girl has been through so much and it just feels like he's causing more pain. Maybe that sounds irrational, but it's how I feel. I tried to open up to a couple of people about my worries. One person chastised me for being discouraged with God and the other person, my mother just dismisses everything I feel and that doesn't help. I know I wrote a lot and I know I probably sound really selfish...I certainly feel that way. But I hate seeing this person hurting and I just wish I could do something to help her during this painful time. I'm sorry if none of this made sense, I just feel overwhelmed and struggling to not feel hopeless.