I feel like I can't feel my own emotions. One of my closest friends recently asked me out. I really really like him, and have known for a long time that this is someone I want in my life in the long term and want to be close to. He spent a night here this week, and we cuddled and we talked quite a bit, and I know I really enjoyed it, but at the same time can't feel the enjoyment. Which, I know, makes no sense. The only other time I've felt this way is when I've been reallllyyyyy depressed, but I've been feeling pretty good for almost a year now. Part of it is that I'm scared things will go badly because they did with my last boyfriend. And those memories are brought back a lot because we mutually decided to keep this a secret, for now, from our friends because we don't want my ex to find out (we're all friends with the same group of people). I am just so confused as to why I can't feel my feelings right now. I really like this guy, but I just feel kinda numb. Like, this is nice, but I can't feel anything deeper than that. And I know its there, its just not accessible.