I'm at a point where I think about suicide every day. I've suffered from anxiety & depression for a number of year. I've had episodes where I've become fused with certain ideas & become obsessive & suicidal. My boyfriend of 6 1/2 years broke up our relationship 2 months ago. He was my world. I had a very stressful job which caused me to burnout. At this time I felt so down & unhappy I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. He broke up with me saying we weren't right for each other. I wanted to marry him. I anted to spend the rest of my life with him. I've had to move half way across the country to live with my parents in my home town. I built up a life over 8 years in that city. I've lost him, my job which took years to get, my home, my pets, our friends. Here I have nothing. I'm a shy girl who takes a while to get to know people. There is nothing here for me. I am nothing and I feel like I don't want to even try. I miss his arms around me. I worked so unbelievably hard to get where I was and build my own life. I feel so anxious and depressed everyday. I can't cope. I feel like I'm going to kill myself. I have no understanding this situation. I feel too old for this. I thought my moods would improve when things were stable but he was my stability. I'm seeing a counsellor at the moment & have been on antidepressants for a long time. I feel if I were back home with him I could start to recover from my work issues and start again. I can't find pleasure in anything any more. I can't change how I think. I just want to go home. I wish I could be more logical about it but I can't I feel abandoned.