Just when life is supposed to be going great for me I begin to buckle under the pressure. I have spent four years in treatment for my PTSD. I have straightened out my life and I am headed for a really positive, wonderful life with my young daughter. Yet tonight, I have come to realize that I have begun to buckle under the pressure and have feelings of suicide once again. I am so frustrated! The idea of going back to school this term is driving me crazy! I am so stressed and feel like there is no chance for me to make it through this semester. I just don't have the drive or determination to do it! Classes start on Friday and as the days tick by my depression has increased exponentially. Tonight I have thought about talking to my counselor, my sister, my friends, even my dad but I am too embarrassed to tell them that I am struggling this badly, still! It would be such a shock to EVERYONE if I were to follow through with suicide right now. I have come so damn far, how can I let something like a few classes drag me down like this! I am hanging on. I can't do this to my family, especially my daughter so I am not going to follow through, just really, really struggling with all this right now.