I have been seeing my boyfriend now for 8 weeks. He's lovely.. he's 4 years older than me and he's 18. I am 14, nearly 15. He is almost 19. I love him with all my heart.. but I can't help but think about the old days. You see.. I knew his brother, who is just a couple of months older than me, before him. We got on well. It's just.. even though I'm happy with my boyfriend.. there's still a spark between me and his brother. There was never a relationship between me and Jay (his brother). Jay was my good friend and he openly admitted he fancied me, and I fancied him.. but not enough to actually go out with him. A few months later, his brother, ruined one of my relationships, told me to dump my boyfriend and then after I did so, I went out with Adam (my boyfriend). Adam had been very forceful.. not in a bad way.. he told me if I didn't want to do anything.. he wouldn't care.. he'd respect that.. but I felt wick.. so I did, and now we're sexually active.. but of course.. we use protection and are very careful. However, I go to his house and Jay would constantly be there.. he would always talk to me.. and so and so. Once Adam even went to the toilet and Jay came right in and put his arm round me. It feels weird, but I miss the days when I used to go out with Justin by myself and have a laugh. I miss the days.. the days when we were mates. We are still good friends but it's not the same. You never realise how much you had until it's gone.. and I'm beginning to wonder.. Jay is a womaniser. He goes from girl to girl. Adam is more settled. He loves me, and I love him fuck loads. He's the best thing to ever happen to me and I love him with all my heart. I just.. anytime Jay and I are left together it's like something is still there. He has all these other girls he goes out with.. and despite I have Adam.. I feel very jealous. Almost to the point where I'm physically crying and become obsessed with their whole relationship.. despite I have a loving and caring boyfriend of my own. Jay is a lovely boy. Anytime he gets dumped (about once every few days) he comes to me for advice. He broke down once and told me how he would never find anyone like me. He's always trying to split me and Adam up.. I can understand why as well. Nearly 2 years as mates.. and then I see his brother.. it's kind of harsh. A month before I seen Adam, me and Jay WERE getting closer.. we were holding hands and cuddling up. Then it kind of faded out. I can just notice I'm aways trying to do something to get his attention. I love Jay. He's amazing. It just took me this long to figure it out. I love Adam.. don't get me wrong. Would it be wrong if it didn't work out between me and Adam to try with his brother? I dunno if it will end with me and Adam.. we are pretty inseperable and very happy with each other. Jay, however.. I can't help but feel jealous all the time. And miss the old days. Especially with a boy my own age. Help?