Hi people. My new year isn't starting out so great. I'm at the low end of a cycle I've been through before. I have the very dangerous habit of forgetting to get my medicine refilled and then making excuses for months because I'm too embarrassed. It just feeds itself and eventually I end up where I am now. Feeling too useless to exist. I feel like the difference right now is that I don't have a close friend to turn to. I have a continuous feeling of being nothing more than a burdensome tag-along to me friends most of the time, and it's just been compounded by the party I was at last night. I got much to drunk and some folks got me settled into a bed to sleep, but I was feeling very bad and down and having a hard time sleeping. Then two of my friends got into the bed and literally started having sex right next to me. I was in too much of a bad state to get up, and I know they could hear me crying, but they just kept going. These were the two people I might actually have felt comfortable talking to about how low I've been lately and I just don't know who to turn to. All day I've been feeling hungover and miserable, and then I got some really ugly things said to me in an online forum, and now I'm just really needing someone to be supportive. So please, can someone just reach out to me.