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feeling very lonely, no friends, no one to talk to

#1
I wish I had friends I have zero people to talk to and just feel like I’m so unimportant/I don’t matter. Even in my own family I get ignored and feel a huge disconnect from them. I’m just so alone and it kills me, I never had friends who seemed to be interested in me on a deeper level and I’m everyone’s last choice. I feel like I’m there for everyone but it’s never reciprocated and if I ever express this to my family they just dismiss it so I have zero people to go to I’m just in my head 24/7.
I don’t even know how you make friends at this point, I’m 18 and live in a small town with very little interest. I like to write, draw, and started crocheting as my hobbies. I don’t know what else to put this is my first time on this forum and last night I felt so low by the constant reminder that I’m lonely and I’m not looking forward for university because I’m afraid of just not meeting anyone who wants me around and I’ll be more alone in such a big environment.
 

Lux

-
SF Supporter
#2
hey,

welcome - I know it's not the same is in real life, but I promise you with a bit of engagement you'll have friends here in people who feel the same as you.

definitely just keep posting, or maybe visit the chat room for more instant response. we're glad to have you
 
#3
Sorry that you're feeling so bad.
I’m lonely and I’m not looking forward for university because I’m afraid of just not meeting anyone who wants me around and I’ll be more alone in such a big environment
A lot of people are able to find friends at university/college even if they had a hard time finding friends before that.

I think some schools may tend to have more support services than others, so you may want to pick/change your school with that in mind.

I hope you'll like it here at SF :)
 

Rasmus

Well-Known Member
#4
Welcome to the forum. Funny thing, we share almost the same hobbies jajjajaja.

Anyways, don't worry too much about the university thing. Normally, nobody is left behind, mostly because everyone needs a little back up, specially during the first months.
 

BlueGreen

Well-Known Member
#5
Hi and welcome, @Avalanche4118
I can really relate to how you're feeling. I'm artistic too and very often felt like a fish out of water. It always seems to me that the nicest or quietest people or those that really give a lot to others emotionally are so often overlooked. I'm sure just from your short post that you are a lovely person and will be a wonderful friend so there is nothing to change, you've just not met 'your' people yet but you will. Nearly all my artistic friends are online and we've known each other a good few years now but I've never met them. I do a painting class that gets me out and my tutor is really inspiring but it took a long time to find it. Have you got art to put online and join with others with similar interests? Hopefully when you get to university you will find a whole new pool of people. My two sons went to university so from their experience I would say try to join in as soon as you feel you can before groups start to form and when everyone is more open - I don't know if that is a common experience but just a thought.

This is a lovely forum with loads of understanding people, and a great place for a rant or a chat or a bit of sympathy when you need it. *hug
 

A_J_R

Well-Known Member
#6
Hi @Avalanche4118,

Welcome!

Not sure this will make you feel better, but when I was 18. I had no one. I actually became agoraphobic after high school, and spent 6 months in my bedroom. My parents were beside themself and didn't know what to do. One day I called suicide hotline out of desperation and the person at the other end told me to just go out the next day, no matter where I went.

I ended up going to the mall with my mom to run an errand, and I went into a record store and the guy working there asked me out. I didn't go out with him but it was a boost and helped me go out in to the world again.

A few months later i got a job at a different record store and made a ton of friends there.

I was very much like you. I just couldn't see anyone coming into my life that I could connect with. But it happened. It took a little time, and making some moves on my part. Finding a job that had employees close to my own age was a good step, maybe you could try that?

I think you will find your tribe. You sound like an amazing person. But be patient, and be kind to yourself.
 
#7
Hi @Avalanche4118,

Welcome!

Not sure this will make you feel better, but when I was 18. I had no one. I actually became agoraphobic after high school, and spent 6 months in my bedroom. My parents were beside themself and didn't know what to do. One day I called suicide hotline out of desperation and the person at the other end told me to just go out the next day, no matter where I went.

I ended up going to the mall with my mom to run an errand, and I went into a record store and the guy working there asked me out. I didn't go out with him but it was a boost and helped me go out in to the world again.

A few months later i got a job at a different record store and made a ton of friends there.

I was very much like you. I just couldn't see anyone coming into my life that I could connect with. But it happened. It took a little time, and making some moves on my part. Finding a job that had employees close to my own age was a good step, maybe you could try that?

I think you will find your tribe. You sound like an amazing person. But be patient, and be kind to yourself.
Thank you I really appreciate this. I rarely leave the house and if I do I never wander anywhere just go to a quick store and leave to go home. I’m currently looking for some jobs and I really appreciate the replies I got it made feel a bit better and not to give up and find other alternatives for looking for new people to befriend. Thank you:)
 
#8
Hi @Avalanche4118,

Welcome!

Not sure this will make you feel better, but when I was 18. I had no one. I actually became agoraphobic after high school, and spent 6 months in my bedroom. My parents were beside themself and didn't know what to do. One day I called suicide hotline out of desperation and the person at the other end told me to just go out the next day, no matter where I went.

I ended up going to the mall with my mom to run an errand, and I went into a record store and the guy working there asked me out. I didn't go out with him but it was a boost and helped me go out in to the world again.

A few months later i got a job at a different record store and made a ton of friends there.

I was very much like you. I just couldn't see anyone coming into my life that I could connect with. But it happened. It took a little time, and making some moves on my part. Finding a job that had employees close to my own age was a good step, maybe you could try that?

I think you will find your tribe. You sound like an amazing person. But be patient, and be kind to yourself.
Welcome to the forum. Funny thing, we share almost the same hobbies jajjajaja.

Anyways, don't worry too much about the university thing. Normally, nobody is left behind, mostly because everyone needs a little back up, specially during the first months.
Very cool that we share the same hobbies! Thank you I feel a bit at ease now about that
 

Joerider101

Well-Known Member
#9
I wish I had friends I have zero people to talk to and just feel like I’m so unimportant/I don’t matter. Even in my own family I get ignored and feel a huge disconnect from them. I’m just so alone and it kills me, I never had friends who seemed to be interested in me on a deeper level and I’m everyone’s last choice. I feel like I’m there for everyone but it’s never reciprocated and if I ever express this to my family they just dismiss it so I have zero people to go to I’m just in my head 24/7.
I don’t even know how you make friends at this point, I’m 18 and live in a small town with very little interest. I like to write, draw, and started crocheting as my hobbies. I don’t know what else to put this is my first time on this forum and last night I felt so low by the constant reminder that I’m lonely and I’m not looking forward for university because I’m afraid of just not meeting anyone who wants me around and I’ll be more alone in such a big environment.
You'll always have friends here. I'm an old timer..we had no texting or Facebook when I was 18... It must b hard to make up close and personal friends these days..living in a small town must even make it harder..as a young adult I had very few friends and still don't today..I have today just a couple of friends but they live far away..I call them regularly and they help me through the hard times
 

KM76710

Kangaroo Manager
SF Pro
SF Supporter
#10
@Avalanche4118

Hello and glad to see you have joined here. I am another from a small town here also off in farmland. The county I live in is 1,000 square miles and the population of the county is only about 20 thousand people. I am not close with many/any? folks and mostly keep to myself. I hope you stay around and join in here.
 
#11
I wish I had friends I have zero people to talk to and just feel like I’m so unimportant/I don’t matter. Even in my own family I get ignored and feel a huge disconnect from them. I’m just so alone and it kills me, I never had friends who seemed to be interested in me on a deeper level and I’m everyone’s last choice. I feel like I’m there for everyone but it’s never reciprocated and if I ever express this to my family they just dismiss it so I have zero people to go to I’m just in my head 24/7.
I don’t even know how you make friends at this point, I’m 18 and live in a small town with very little interest. I like to write, draw, and started crocheting as my hobbies. I don’t know what else to put this is my first time on this forum and last night I felt so low by the constant reminder that I’m lonely and I’m not looking forward for university because I’m afraid of just not meeting anyone who wants me around and I’ll be more alone in such a big environment.
Loneliness does suck, and making friends does seem like an impossible task especially with mental health issues, and not having friends to meet people through.

I would love to be your friend and chat with you here, and I am sure many others would be your friend too.

As for real life friends, maybe just strike up conversations to people you might see daily? Or say hello if you are too shy. I know lots of acquaintances at the gym who I have small chat with and that helps with loneliness. Not really true friends, but small talk does help you feel less alone.

All my current friends are people I am lucky to have met in highschool. It just feels so hard to make new genuine friendships that last so I do understand your struggle.

Keep your head up
 

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