Feelings of Inadequacies

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Zurkhardo, Aug 20, 2009.

  1. Zurkhardo

    Zurkhardo Well-Known Member

    It's strange that despite being in a relative decent mood I feel such strong, negative reactions to myself. My physical appearance, my face, my masculinity, and even my vaunted intelligence. Maybe it's because I've been single for pretty much 4 years, and have foolishly let that determine my level of attractiveness. Or maybe it's because I've fallen into near-pathological self-loathing for as long as I could remember. I don't know anymore...
  2. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    I think you would appreciate Schopenhauer's witty essays on love and human relationships (that is, if you haven't already read them). He is gruff but loveable. Don't be put off by the people who misinterpret him as a misanthrope.
  3. Zurkhardo

    Zurkhardo Well-Known Member

    I've heard a lot about him but haven't gotten around too much of work (I might have read a little something concerning his debate with Hegel). I'll check it out man, thanks a lot.
  4. Deijerz

    Deijerz Member

    Ive been single for awhile but I love being single at the same time. My thought is if someone doesn't want to know me then that's their loss cause I'm a hot catch :)

    And I might have to check these essays out as well. I may be a girl but I can appreciate good writing!
  5. Zurkhardo

    Zurkhardo Well-Known Member

    Actually, a part of me prefers to be single, but I guess that part tends to subside once in a while, especially at night.
  6. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    Hey Romney (I know I usually call you Zurk but this is more personal), through our many conversations I never picked up on anything but confidence.

    I'm really sorry to hear of this my friend. Believe me when I tell you I can relate to self-loathing. But my best years were between about 20 and 33 as far as relationships go, so maybe it will happen for you if you want it. I know you said that a part of you prefers to be single, but maybe that is because of the self-loathing. People definitely pick up on this and you will need to get past that. The only thing that helped me were friends boosting my self=esteem. What I know of you is an incredibly intelligent individual with a kind soul. I know there are many out there that would be happy to be with a person such as yourself. I'm hoping it will come, but only if you want it.

    You know you can send me a pm any time if you want to talk about it privately. You have many, many positive attributes that far outweigh anything negative you may feel about yourself.
  7. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    I just received a PM from shades calling me a pseudo-intellectual. Shades also says that Schopenhauer was a racist and so by implication my recommending Schopenhauer must make me a racist too.

    Shades, mate, I'm very hurt by this... I just think Schopenhauer was a talented and humorous writer is all. I never claimed to be an "intellectual" either. :unsure:
  8. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    Please ignore this post now as he (Shades, not Schopenhauer) has apologised.
  9. Zurkhardo

    Zurkhardo Well-Known Member

    Thanks to both of you for your kind input, and no worries about the conflict, it happens.

    Thanks for the self-esteem booster Shades, it means a lot. I guess I just had one of those nights when I posted this; then again it seems to come often so maybe I'll consider therapy or something. In the meantime I'll have you guys :)
  10. CAD

    CAD Well-Known Member

    And Schopenhauer.