I don't know how much longer I can fight these feelings. There is only one good reason to fight and he might be better off without me... I just want to feel better and feel wanted. I need him here with me to feel capable of surviving, but his father is keeping him away from me. I'll never understand why someone could keep a child away from their parent. Life feels pointless without him. I've spent 4 years raising him and now he's gone just like that barely getting to c him twice a month having to explain why mommy can't come hone. He hates me for it and just wanted to go back to daddy's when he's here. I just want my little boy in my arms again.