Fighting flashbacks

Discussion in 'Rape and Abuse' started by TBear, Jun 3, 2011.

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  1. TBear

    TBear Antiquities Friend

    Seems like this is always a fight - things get stirred up, triggers

    My new therapist wants me to try to contain - keep grounded...

    Re-experiencng is re-traumatizing; if I can possibly keep the images at bay - try to distract.... examine and identify - tolerate the feelings - internal compassion....

    Last therapist used to encourage me to see what was there - but I was in a constant state of crisis... now I feel the images - see them - the experiences are just under the surface - ready to burst forth - leaving me so anxious, scared and sad - but certainly more stable, albeit miserable

    There is so much that if I start to go with it - then I can be devastated for days; the trauma was so pervasive, ongoing and horrific....

    I am emotionally drained and don't know how much longer I can hang on..... I've been told that taking it slower now will be faster in the long run - develop strength that will enable me to tolerate.... Hurts - so confused feeling
  2. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    TBear - my heart goes out to you.

    I've been struggling so bad the last week or so, triggered so much and not knowing what way is up, kind-of feeling.

    It is confusing - isn't it? But hopefully you have developed a healthy therapeutic relationship with your therapist to trust them.

    I am still coming up with a good mantra, for use of a better word, that I can repeat over when things start to pop up. The hardest thing for me is dealing with the trigger in a way. Its a difficult one to control but I have to try as I really can't deal or handle the flashbacks too well. I'm trying, really trying.

    I'm sorry this is such a rough time for you. Have patience with yourself, believe in yourself that you will get through this. It will take time, but you will get there. Believe that.

    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 3, 2011
  3. tweetypie

    tweetypie Antiquities Friend

    Hi hun :hug: i really dont understand how this kind of therapy works but i do hope that it eventually works for you maybe keeping on posing about it might help . goodluck and big hugs xxx
  4. TBear

    TBear Antiquities Friend

    From what I have read and this therapist has said.... when the trauma, violations and abuse start at such a young age and go on for years.... it can't be handled the same way as traumas that happen after the personality has had a chance to form.....

    There is no one incident to process - There is an entire entire rotten marriage... an entire way of reacting...

    Seems impossible - but the impossible just takes longer....

    So sorry you are going thru this stuff - flashbacks, although I understand them, are so hard to deal with....

    The best I can do is to remind myself - I am safe now - this is a different time -I am not a child/ helpless.... then do something to ground myself with my body to bring me back - a pretty smell/ bare feet on the floor/ push hard on a wall - feel something - even holding a peice of ice.....

    Thanks for the encouragement..... :hug: :sad:
  5. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Yes, nothing is impossible - as you said it will just take a little longer.

    I'm working on grounding, fingers crossed the last couple of days have been better.

    Take care of yourself TBear. :hug:
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