Finally I know (suicide)

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by marthijn1987, Apr 23, 2007.

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  1. marthijn1987

    marthijn1987 Guest

    Dear suicidal people,:smile:

    This is my last post on the Suicide Forum.

    Now I know for sure: I don’t want to live anymore!

    I’m happy because when I am dead, everything is over.:smile:

    I told my family that I want to commit suicide, and they understand it, but don’t want me to do it.It’s really hard for them.But there great parents.

    But now I know that there is no GOD and that we humans are just animals…from animal –human, there is now only fear left. Because the pressure to live in the 21 Century is not for me. I don’t accept my body, my mind, my way of thinking and more.

    I’m so happy my parents know now that I am going away for ever, they know that I really suffer, so I ques they understand.

    I hate this capitalism system, it’s all about money and power and success.
    And I don’t want to be part of this.

    I know someone who wants to help me, I am not going to trow myself for the train, because you heard other people with this, so don’t do that!
    I just want to die without having a lot of pain, and now I know a way how!

    This is my last post, I’m not going to kill myself today, but in a coplle of weeks
    I’m so happy because when I’m dead I don’t have to suffer anymore, don’t have to live on this awful planet (that’s just my sad opinion)

    I don’t post this message for attention and You don’t have to reply or send me a PM, because I will not reply anymore.
    I really liked it to chat with you all!

    And for all the people who hate me! now you have what you wanted!:eek:hmy:


    ~~~Marthijn~~~:sad: :eek:hmy:
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2007
  2. reborn1961

    reborn1961 Guest

    Can I ask what drives you to suicide? I suspect it is not due to society or religion. If your parents are alright with this, is your issue a health one? I know you may or may not reply but I hope you sit down with your family again and really look at what you are doing. Whatever choice you make, I hope it is what you really want. Take care.
  3. well if you do happen to read this, no that this isnt the way hun and there are alot alot of people out there and here who can help you to make your life less painful. reach out for support . pm me if you come back and want to talk xx
  4. Panther

    Panther Well-Known Member

    :hug: if you reconsider please feel free to come here and ask for help, or just vent. I hope you are able to think a bit and maybe change your intention.
  5. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    How do you know there's no God?
    I also wonder what this 'way of dying with no pain' is that you've found...of course you can't answer that. I just hope you thought it through.
    Oh, and I don't hate you since I don't know you and I doubt anyone on here could hate you because to us you're just words on a screen, we all are. We don't, for the most part, really know each other so how on earth we could hate you is beyond me.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 23, 2007
  6. Flight

    Flight Well-Known Member

    In my experience: The pain you are about to inflict on everyone you love won't be worth it in the end. The most difficult thing about life is living, but when one person dies, it makes life even that much harder for everyone else.

    It's a trajedy when someone dies by disease or accident. How much worse does it hurt to know that the person commited suicide? That you couldn't help them - that even though you were a part of their life, they still felt it was all trash?

    Your loved ones are going to feel this way. They weren't good enough.

    If you die - what if there is nothing, not even the experience of nothing? That means the last thing you may ever experience is a wretching, painful, self inflicted death. You'll never move past that moment. It won't be like sleep, it won't be calm static, it won't be peaceful. If anything, you might get a "what have I done?" before you realize that you just threw away any peaceful moment you might have had.

    Sleep is peaceful, a calm day is peaceful. You have to EXIST to be in a state of mood. The dead are not peaceful, they are dirt.

    I don't know if we aren't supposed to say "suicide is selfish," but it's true. The thing it took me a long time to understand is that it's better to live selfishly than die selfishly. I always felt like such a martyr, taking the weight of this stupid world on my shoulders. Feeling all the pain. I was very selfless. Then, the only way I thought I could escape is just the one selfish act of suicide.

    It was some time before I realised that if I did other selfish acts - like wasting some money, sleeping the day away, telling people how I really feel, that it was a lot better than the necessity of hurting myself.

    Life is a damn hard struggle, but it's worth it. Sure we all die in the end, that's why you have to take hold of right now. Nothing else really matters anyway. Just do yourself a favour, do something you enjoy right now. Ask for help if you need to later. People will be there whether it seems like they will or not. ...Just remember that people are human like yourself, and may not say the perfect thing. (or even ballpark it!)
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 23, 2007
  7. worlds edge

    worlds edge Well-Known Member

    You don't know this. Or at a minimum you're generalizing from your specific case to some sort of rule about all others.

    How on earth can you know this?

    Sounds pretty good to me.

    Which will be followed by nothing. Again, doesn't seem all that terrible.

    So? In my case dirt would be an improvement.

    I don't dispute that it can be, but I'd be interested in finding out how that the act itself is selfish in all cases, which seems to be what you're saying.

    Bully for you, I guess.

    Prove it.

    And how is the act of suicide not doing this?

    Why not do something you enjoy and then not ask for help?

    Oh, I have no doubt the mental health establishment is always on the prowl for fresh meat. As long as the fresh meat has insurance or is otherwise independently wealthy.

    That's putting it rather mildly.
  8. Flight

    Flight Well-Known Member

    Wow, how nice of you.

    I will add the three little words I seem to have missed, thanks.

    But I'm curious as to what has befallen you that your existence is worse than dirt. I'd also like you to explain to me if you've ever had a loved one commit suicide. In a PM, so as not to hijack this thread. I'd like to know what instances you can point out where suicide is worth it, even in a utilitarian system of ethics (I know they are out there, but we should draw the guidelines in the sand and see if it applies here, no? They did say that had parents, and I doubt they are very old.)

    Also, because I can't resist a parthian shot:

    You believe you can nail me for generalizations, and then say this? Give me a break. Strangely enough it does seem like friends, family, and *gasp* even concerned strangers will listen to you if you really need it. Humans are social animals. I think that's what these forums are for?
  9. Sakura

    Sakura Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry that we never got the chance to meet and get to know each other. You seem like a good person, and I'm sorry that you feel that it is now time for you to leave. Just know one matter where you go...or what you do...there is always life after death. Yes, we are all animals...but we are animals with souls. I hope that one day we will get that chance to meet each other on the other side ^^
    And if you do decide to stick around for a while longer, then I definitely look forward to meeting you here one day! ^^

    Take care hon :hug:
  10. worlds edge

    worlds edge Well-Known Member

    I assume you mean "In my experience..."? That does make a huge difference from where I'm sitting. Assuming you mean the addition, and that you accept the fact that the conclusions you've reached are not necessarily universal principles, I now have very few issues with anything you wrote.

    And I'm curious why you think life is worth living. Should I expect your answer anytime soon? After all, you're certainly not trying to hold me to a higher standard than you hold yourself, are you? :smile:

    I decline. If and/or when I post about such things I'll do it publicly.

    I'm not all that knowledgable about Utilitarianism, but I think I grasp Stoicism fairly well. I'm actually mulling out a short essay on Stoicism and suicide, but it is not ready. And may or may not ever be.

    I didn't "nail you for generalizations," you nailed yourself. And the way you un-
    nail yourself is to back up your claims is with logical or factual arguments.

    Oh, and sheesh, there you go again....

    This hasn't been my experience. In fact the few times I've admitted to being depressed or what have you it has always been the case that I'd have been better off keeping my mouth shut. So from where I'm sitting you're flat out wrong.

    [quote Humans are social animals.[/quote]

    Most humans are probably social animals, but it does not stand to reason or observation that all are. As in, most people don't like to drink Moxie, but it hardly follows that all don't like it (In fact, I do)

    Perhaps you're right. It certainly does provide a venue I would not otherwise have.
  11. Parker

    Parker Member

    They care as much as they want to care, but truth is - nobody ever wants to care. By some time suddenly appears they have a limit of caring. Everybody around (except few) are just hypocrites, in any measure. And never matters how much "you really need". They are just playing with us, otherwise we'd be living in much more better place. If you had a billion dollars, would you just let it away? Such wasn't from the start, later it revealed itself.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 24, 2007
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