finally

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Insignificant, Apr 1, 2007.

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  1. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    sunday is the day. some may think by my waiting it won't happen but if by some freak chance this is all thwarted and i live through this at least i know i can still have my job by the timing of it all.

    ever sinse i got out of the hospital this is all i can think about and the ease i feel about all this. i'm sorry to those of you who know me. please all take care of yourselves.
     
  2. itachi

    itachi Well-Known Member

    :cry:
     
  3. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Last night you were all for fighting and doing everything you can to help yourself and your children. What changed?

    Having fought so hard, why give in now? You could take yourself back to hospital and get the help you need, you know that there is help there, the right meds, etc. What's the harm in trying to get it again?
     
  4. gitana

    gitana SF Friend & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    I am sorry, I don't know your story and according to your posting you have been here for awhile.

    I agree with Scum.. Maybe you need to check out being on the right meds, or hospitalization, it sounds like.. What happened? You recently got out of the hospital? Did they set you up with any therapy?

    You have children? How old are they? I encourage you to really really think about your children. no matter the age. It will affect them for life, I know.. I know several people who were young and a parent suicided and it has affected them all their life.. one friend, witnessed her father, and screwed her up when she was older mentally...

    When my best friend suicided, she had no idea how much her mom really loved her.. yeah, they had problems like parents and kids do.. her mom had a nervous breakdown.. shook me up really bad.. if she only knew how much her mom really loved her deeply.. On the other hand, if your children are little... think again.. believe me, it will affect them as they grow up.. I know... been thru alot myself and know people who have been through this.. I won't elaborate more on this except think of your children. Children are a gift. Yeah, I know, when one gets to that age, teens, it seems like, yeah, right.. pure hell.. sure.. can't deal with it.. than they grow up... and may have children and reality...or just growing up.. past those years..

    I know life is difficult to go on and deal with.. Pressures, and yeah, have been there many times in my life, SF has really helped me alot.. Please please, if not for you, for your children.. a day, a second at a time.. Please lean on us and keep sharing with us more.. Keep talking.. I know the fight is difficult when going through alot.. I know it is painful and hurt so deeply whatever life may hand us.. or what we are all dealing with.. I am really concerned about your children.. You know.. it doesn't have to be this Sunday at all.. Give it more time.. It may be the depression talking.. I know I have been there alot.. From a therapist I had.. called a Suicidal Trance.. that is all I knew when I was young.. There is help.. just finding the right help.. Are you seeing a therapist?

    Also, it is a generation thing.. passes down to the children.. one may thnk that it doesn't affect the children but it really does. I remember seeing my uncle one night, I was close to, a couple hours away visiting, when I was young, and he was really happy.. The next day, shock, to find out, that he was gone.. and then later my cousin, his son, close too, gone. And his brother, ended up in mental hospital for quite some time..

    I hope you will listen to us and not go through with your plans.. We are here for you.. I am here for you.. My heart goes deeply out to you. Life sucks and yeah, it is very difficult and painful.. I know.. I am still here because of finding SF by "accident." I hope you will reconsider and listen and allow us to help you walk through your pain.. and allow us to support you. Lean on us..Okay? When the going gets tough.. and there is no hope in sight.. I know and many here do too and that is why we are here.. feeling hopeless, rejected, and so much more.. there seems no light at the end of the tunnel and one may not be able to see their way out when so many things overwhelm us and it helps to talk it thru with people who understand and sincerely care. I wouldn't be here to tell you this, if not so.. I can't promise that it will get better.. but jiust know that you have people here who really love you and care about you tremendously.. I know you may feel alone right now, and we aren't there in person to help you but we are here and real.... wanting to help you and support you.. Please, don't do anything right now.. Okay??

    Love

    Gitana
     
  5. Allo..

    Allo.. Well-Known Member

    Ohh liz.. please don't give up

    Remember that day with your kids.. don't you want that to happen again? Didn't that make it seem all worth while? Just one more day like that.. please liz..
     
  6. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Please don't do this hun :awww:
     
  7. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    you know when a person is really low and then they go into the hospital and are there till they are brought out of it? you know how they say beware afterwards because that boost up may be all they need to committ the act. well, that just might be what is going on here. i was happy though but today i found sadness sinse my recent visit to the hospital. i've got enough to do myself in. i am thinking about calling for help but this would mean my daughter would need to leave the house again. it just makes it seem so complicated. i am not up for that anymore.

    gitana i hope you know i love my kids with all my heart but they don't need this. that's all i can say about this. i try to be a friend too but fail there also.

    it's remarkable how much ease there feels in this.

    the moment just feels like it's drawing closer. what to do what to do??
     
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