I am just so ready to end it all. Ive been struggling for a long time, and even went to counciling, and am on antidepressants. Financially speaking, Im completely broke. I cant pay next months mortgage, and the guy I got into my house to pay the rent is a deadbeat and wont pay. So, i gotta get him evicted. I am also getting close again to loosing my job. God i hate furloughs! I have been traveling around the country for over a year trying to work, and I have just about had enough. I am so lonely, and have no friends nor family near me. I have that urge to kill myself almost all the time, and its been like fighting a 1000lb gorrilla. Im tired of fighting. The meds make me like a zombie. I know I should be able to cry, but I cant anymore. I am depressed and tired all the time. I just want it to end.