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Finding God...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by fixmein45, Aug 13, 2007.

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  1. fixmein45

    fixmein45 Member

    I'm not exactly suicidal anymore after what happened to me a month ago or so... but I am depressed and the old thoughts crossed my mind. I was doing great for awhile.

    I met a girl who was amazing and her dad was a youth minister at their church. She told me I had to ask his permission to date her so I went to church a few times to get to know him and get ready to ask and when I was about to (after a week or so of getting to know him) she came around and told me that she never intended to "date" me and only wanted to be my friend.

    Well that hurt. I asked her for her phone number and she told me "I don't think your gonna get it." -- because her dad didn't like me. I tried to find God. I passionately wanted to FEEL him inside me and his presence... but I never felt it like she or others around her and me did.

    ... in addition, apparently I'm not good enough for her in her dad's eyes. What kind of Christian views is this? I don't drink or party or anything bad. The worse thing I do is not go to church enough, but that was apparently enough to condemn me. Plus she says she didn't lie to me but she TOLD me to ask him and that "persistence pays off" and all this jazz... but then acts like she never meant it that way.

    Well I'm depressed again but not so much suicidal. But I feel pretty down and I gotta say that I passionately want to "find God" and was wondering if anyone here has ever actually "felt" God...

    are those people who claim to have felt God in them just crazy and making that up or is it actually a feeling you can get?
  2. Well, I'm atheist so I have a strong disbelief that no entity more powerful than a modern day scientist exists. Therefore I have been naturally curious as to how Christians can go on preaching their BS and enthusiasts soaking it up like a sponge in piss. Though instead of wasting your time with a huge rant I'll get right to the point; Frankly I think the "feeling" of God is a feeling people experience quite often, Christians simply try and fit every day and perfectly un-divine feelings into there religion along with natural, daily events to support their beliefs. I speculate this "feeling of God" is simply a burst of inspiration, resolve or reconciliation which they believe is induced by coming under the spiritual influence of their God. I hope that helps.
  3. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry this girl is jerking you around and her father seems unkind also :(

    That said, yes, sometimes I can feel God, but it's not a constant spiritual high or anything. It does take work. Faith in God is not something you have or you do not, it is actually a matter of degree. I find that the more I pray, the closer I feel to God. I often pray for faith, and I find that it helps me a great deal. I have found that for me personally, praying the rosary is a great facilitator to my faith.

    Also, I have personally experienced some miraculous things in my life, and I have known people who have experienced what can only be defined as miracles (rosaries turning into gold, verified by jewelers, etc.)

    If you want to PM me I would be glad to share some of my thoughts and experiences with you.

    I think it is wonderful that you are trying to find God, you just need to remember that people are still just people, and even those who say they believe in God can behave in a way that belies this.

    Good luck on your spiritual quest. :)
  4. JFonseka

    JFonseka Active Member

    There are perhaps millions of scientists who are Christians that would argue this point you have just made. Metaphorically "soaking of piss in a sponge" doesn't help your case, restrict the embellishments and point out some facts with some citations if you are going to be using your scientifical methods. I am not against science, infact I am a scientist, so it's highly amusing to me how you call science your 'entity' if you wish and then come up with a premise and use your personal opinions to support your argument with no approved scientific reasoning, in short some maybe just theoretical pertaining to a branch in psychology, that which you have mentioned and is opened to debate.

    Here is scientific fact for you to wrap your brain around for a while:

    Matter - which everything we can see and a lot of what we can't see but know exists, make up 4% of the universe, the rest of matter, known as dark matter which make up the majority is unknown as we know nothing about it.

    It indeed is a bold statement to try to use science as some divine 'entity' as you put it, especially when 96% of the universe is unknown, good day.:cool:
  5. JFonseka

    JFonseka Active Member

    Dude, feelings come and go, I don't 'feel' God all the time, but that's not what matters, it's a will and commitment that matters. When people say they love God, a lot of people think oh they must be having such intense feelings, but no that's not the case, love is the will and commitment to do something for someone no matter what, in the best interest of that person.

    Love can't be a feeling, because feelings come and go, unless you like to say love is always coming and going :laugh: So just beware that feelings are based on circumstance, so when circumstances change, feelings change. PM if you want to talk about this.

    Just beware its natural for dad's to be overly protective of their daughters, so he is probably looking for every excuse against you, it's nothing new, it's been happening for years :wink: That's the challenge. If you really like her, then respect her wishes, and her dad's wishes, remain friends, then you will see in the future if you truly love her or not, remember feelings are important, but don't do things based just on your feelings, if you do; you will end up like a lot of other people who did things in the moment and then regretted it because their 'feelings' changed. Love is the will and commitment to continue and in the best interests of the beloved, that is why when you take marriage vows in the Christian sense it's "for better or for worse, until death do us apart" not until boredom does us apart.

  6. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Agreed. Love is more of an action than a feeling. Of course it is a feeling as well, but in order to keep it alive you must act. Show love. People get lazy and complacent and just STOP showing their love, they stop trying, which leads to a deterioration of the relationship, whether it be a relationship with a significant other or with God himself.
  7. JFonseka

    JFonseka Active Member

    Yea well when I said love isn't a feeling, I just think that feelings happen when someone is in love, but it's not love itself, just my opinion, but I guess you agree with most of what I said anyways.
  8. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    I do. Love, although it is most certainly a feeling, is something we must work to perfect. It is not something that simply sustains itself over time with little or no effort. Love is like a job in a way. If you neglect it or if you trivialize it, it will diminish. It requires a great deal of effort and time, but it is SO worth the payoff.
  9. Panther

    Panther Well-Known Member

    firstly, I'm sorry to hear about that girl, unfortunately that is a somewhat familiar story to me, pastors in churches like to have 'a bit of a say' in who their daughter goes out with, it's just a form of control. You may hate me saying this, but it's better if you don't go out with someone like that in the long run. This is not a unique situation so don't feel bad that 'you're not enough for her Dad', Dads like that need a good slapping.

    I was a Christian for 15 years and it can be a big help. By all means, go to a church, one that actually cares about people, there must be some around, but also a site like this is a great help, so stick around :hug:
  10. JFonseka

    JFonseka Active Member

    Dad's like that don't need a good slapping, watch your mouth, especially with the shit that happens in the world these day's, I'd probably be like that if I had a daughter and she was starting to date guys.

    Way to go to dictate what a dad should be doing and what they shouldn't be doing on dating issues :dry:
  11. RCC

    RCC Well-Known Member

    Having the Holy Spirit in you, is like, never feeling alone.

    I'm sure you're a great guy and I'm sure his just a typical
    Dad looking out for his little girl.

    If I had a daughter I wouldn't let her date until she was 30!
  12. make_me_bad

    make_me_bad Well-Known Member

    yeah i bet you wouldn't, not that she'd want to since you'd brainwash her from birth to believe that enjoying anything or having fun means eternal damnation.
  13. Panther

    Panther Well-Known Member

    If a guy is slightly dodgy or your daughter being with him will make hers and possibly your life worse, then that of course is another issue, the issue I have is that if the guy is perfectly decent and the girl likes/loves him, then he should at least be given a chance. Which sounds the case here.
  14. RCC

    RCC Well-Known Member

    Why do you choose to be so miserable? Does it make you feel better to come on a forum where people are struggling and berate an ubiquitous religion of peace and love?
  15. reefer madness

    reefer madness Account Closed

    Did the dad tell you he didn't like you or are you just believing another lie of hers?
  16. Random

    Random Well-Known Member

    Just having read the initial post, I think that at the very least, this girl has some kind of issues. She's probably manipulating you. honestly, I'd get away and stay away from this church. It's normal for a father to worry about who his daughter is seeing. It's not normal to be told to ask the father for permission and then be told she wasn't the slightest bit interested in you.

    Her telling you to ask him for permission was implying that she was interested and would likely say yes.
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