I am a 23 year old guy living in England who has contemplated suicide a couple of times in the past. Things just seem to build up and my feelings get on top of me. I think I have depression but have never seen a doctor about it. Everything in life seems to go wrong for me and I think the easiest way out is to disappear. I am not in trouble with the law and don't have money problems but am stuck in a hole I can't get out of - I hate myself. Two distant relatives have committed suicide and someone I went to school with took his own life too. His family wrote a book about the ordeal which I read and it didn't make me feel any different. Obviously if I do something then I understand how painful it is going to be for those left behind... that at the moment is the only thing stopping me. I am taking one day at a time but I don't know how long I can keep fighting this.