First post

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by RainingRozes, Aug 20, 2016.

  1. RainingRozes

    RainingRozes New Member

    Hello everybody,

    My name is Rose and I am new to this forum. I've been really struggling these last few months. I guess I'll just start at the beginning.

    I don't remember being happy... Like ever. Not even when I was a kid. At school I was bullied relentlessly. My dad was always working. My mom was always sleeping. My older brother and I pretty much raised our younger siblings. Not exactly a happy childhood.

    College wasn't much better. I dropped out after I got raped. Ofcourse I got pregnant... So I got an abortion. I never told anyone... Just wrote it down on a support site.

    Right now I am working as a maid... And I hate it. I've been trying to get a different job for years. I just can't seem to land one. I considered going back to college. But I just can't afford it. In any case it won't do much good. I'm 35 years old... Obviously too old to get hired... But I do what I always do... Put on a smile and soldier on.

    It all makes me so tired. I feel like I could sleep for a week. People keep saying "This too shall pass". Would be nice to know when...
  2. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Hey there Raining, welcome to the forum. Life can be difficult at times(most of the time :) It sounds like you've been dealt some raw deals in yours. But you're "soldering on" which is good. Btw you're not to old to attempt further education, I was almost forty when I got my RN degree, it did take a lot of work, two part time jobs and College.
    Maybe see what's available in grants where you live, sometimes there are some for mature students. Is there anyone you can speak with in your family or your doctor? It helps to share our problems with others, that's basically what we do here. I'm glad you found us and hope you continue to post, there are a lot of good people here facing a variety of life problems, so just remember you're no longer alone.
  3. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    Welcome to the forum Rose. It's not too late to go back to school. What about talking to financial aid offices?

    Hugs. Have you considered counselling for your rape?
    Brian777 likes this.
  4. SinisterKid

    SinisterKid Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hiya Rose and welcome to SF. I cannot begin to imagine what you have been through during your lifetime. I agree with Brian, you need to fully explore all your options before you dismiss anything.

    You are tired which is probably why you are struggling right now. So much that is good in life stems from good sleep. Is it possible to see a doctor and maybe ask for something to help you sleep? I think you will benefit from a few nights of good sleep. Then you might have the energy to investigate the possibilities that might be open to you. 35 is not old by any means.

    Hopefully now you have found us, you will remain a active member. I am sure there are members here who will relate very well to your problems and you can exchange thoughts/ideas/suggestions etc etc.
    Brian777 likes this.
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hello Rose and welcome to the forums, it is lovely to ''meet'' you =)

    Glad you decided to join us here as we're a very supportive and caring empathetic community and everyone's problems matter here. I hope you do find a job that will help you feel better about yourself and your life. Do you have any family? Does anyone in real life know about your issues? Maybe it is time to get therapy for the rape and therapy for the abortion if needed, you mentioned it so I am assuming it is bothering you. Anyway, best of luck on this site and remember when things get bad, you always have us to fall back on! (hugs)
  6. SillyOldBear

    SillyOldBear Teddy Bear Fanatic Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hi Raining. Welcome to SF. So sorry that you have been through so much. I was bullied as a kid too. Have blacked most of it out. Please remember that there are good people out. Most people don't bully or rape. And I was 62 when I found my current job. I have no great skills to market myself either. 35 is definitely not to old to get hired. It is also not too old for school. Tis never too old for that. Like Brian suggested, do look for grants. Check with the Employment Security Dept. Talk to the schools. Financial help is out there. Even if you only take one class a quarter, you can get there. I was 49 when I finally finished a degree. You can do it!
    sahel likes this.
  7. sahel

    sahel SF Supporter

    Hi Rose,

    Feeling unhappy about what you do everyday matters a lot. I am sorry that you don't like your job. Like everybody said 35 is not old by any means. Besides, I don't know where you live but in many places people are not allowed to ask your age when they are interviewing you, with hairstyle and make up you can decide to look older or younger.
    If college is not affordable and there is no way to get financial aids, there are some certificates that you can get on some skills, you can check them to see if you are interested in learning something special. For example I know that there are classes for being a hair stylist that give you certificates in the end. Though, I don't know how effective the certificates will be while looking for a job.