Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by An Angel in Black, Jan 21, 2008.

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  1. An Angel in Black

    An Angel in Black Well-Known Member

    hi sweety, i have written this thread for you. At least hear me out before you make any final decision. This was honestly the first time i had been to a thread like this before, and i was sooo nervous. The very first post I ever got was from you, telling me its ok; to hang in there. And I did just that, Ive read on your posts, and know you have bipolar with severe deppression. After that i told myself you might have been worse off with me, but you were still fighting, still hanging in there. A person with such a big heart must be absolutely wonderful i thought to myself..:laugh: I told myself i wanted to be like you. i wanted to be as thoughtful and as courages as you are. since that day ive tried to be a little more optimistic on my situation, and realize there were others that needed help too. So i jumped on forum after forum trying to be the kind of person you are, helping others out. And you know what, i started to feel pretty good knowing that i stopped them, that i gave them that shred of light that lit their path through the darkness, just like you had done for me. But if you fade now, that little shred of light that has shown me my way through the darkness so far, will be a little dimmer. and i dont want that. i want it to shine will all the love of my friends so to be as bright as possible, i dont want to poke out an eye or j/k but seriously though, its moments like being helped by wonderful poeple like you that i know i can continue going forward, without looking back because i know forever that my friends have my back. in return ill never leave their side if we are together, if im behind them, ill watch out for them, and if im in front of them ill try as hard as i can to guide them through the darkness, and we'll come out holding hands side by be honest, i was hoping to hold your hand a little longer as well before i let go. will you continue to hold mine?:sad:
  2. This may be the wrong thing to say, but you said "hanging in there". Interesting choice of words.

    I just went to a was horrible. I felt like the dead person, wishing I was him. Anyways, people would ask me how I am doing. I did not know what to say, so I said "hanging in there". Then I got all weirded out because I have been thinking of hanging myself lately. Go figure...
  3. An Angel in Black

    An Angel in Black Well-Known Member

    You poor thing, i know the feeling. I was at a funeral last year, and the man i went to the funeral for i hardly got to know, and i let bitterness get the best of me. but i found out what a wonderful person he was and after that, i felt so horrible, lets just say im lucky i wasnt near an edge. i would have given my life in exchange for his, and still would. he was an older man, and poor, but had a huge heart. i heard a couple of rumors though, and unfourtanantly with my social phobia avoided him completely until i really started to get to know him. after that i didnt care what he had done, he was a wonderful person and i deserve to die for not seeing that first. at the funeral, i couldnt help but to cry, and heavily too. i know how hard it can be, to watch a loved one just disspear, and leave you behind to fend for yourself. but you know what, the secret is you dont really have to let go, because i believe they dont really let go of you either, but they watch you from heaven and your hearts will always be connected. thats why i hate to see people leave their loved ones behind, thats why you should hang in there too, because you are somebody, and if you ever need to rant or talk please let me know or email me and i will be there for you. i will give you wings when you can no longer fly, i will light your way when the candle goes out, and i will be there to hold your hand when things get so hard you couldnt possibly do it alone. please let me know if you would like to talk, or add me to msn, i would love to hear from you. ^_^

    LILICHIPIE Well-Known Member


    your thoughts brought tears
    I hope ull be having a good day today pleqse get back soon
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    That was very thoughtful of you Angel for posting your heartfelt thoughts for Agnes. You see Agnes, there are people who care for you dearly and want you to keep on living hun. You helped Angel rediscover the value of life and in return, he wants to help you to rediscover value in your life. I've been to so many funerals in my short life (I'm 27) and I know that I as I get older, I will be going to many more, due to my aging relatives. Agnes, the image of you hanging in a hotel room is making tears flow from my eyes. Please don't do it hun.
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