friend left and i just got this urge to die

[icequeen]

i have been numb for weeks, friend just left and i really want to cut and die

i have beeen numb for weeks so this confuses me...i am struggling not to
hurt or more

 

[total eclipse]

I am sorry y our friend was there a reason for leaving can you get a hold of friend on cell phone or computer just to talk. I hope you continue to reach out here okay make new friends here hugs

 

[may71]

do you mean a friend died, or is just going to be away. if just going away, will they be back? can you contact them?

 

[icequeen]

friend went home..i was stressed after session with pysch and exposure therapy...just soooooo damn tired these days...its hard to see what is what and to even care...last night i came so close after exposure i was surprised when i actually woke up and realised i was alive...have to do same again later...and am just trying to save energy to face exposure therapy again but i have to trust my therapist that this is something i need to do...thanks for the concern...just another ride on the rollercoaster of our lives.. :shelbi:

 

[MoAnamCara]

Icequeen -

therapy can be extremely difficult - especially the type you are talking about. But to be doing it is great, so kudos for you. I know it can trigger us too, or for me it can, so try to be gentle with yourself afterwards so you don't go into the same type of tailspin.

Take care.

 

[total eclipse]

still with exposure therapy a good therapist knows how to bring you back to the present in a stable safe atmosphere YOu should feel better at the end of therapy safe if it is done properly Let you doctor know how unstable you are after these meeting okay so something can be changed so you don't feel so unwell afterwards

 

[MoAnamCara]

yes, total eclipse is right, I should've said that.

Wish my therapist also did a better job of this.

 

[icequeen]

thanks folks, didnt last as long last night with the exposure as i didnt feel safe forcing myself to do more...will discuss with therapist on friday...and will limit exposure before i reach tipping point...i think it doesnt help that i am so tired all the time - just makes it harder to keep pushing...but have made the call that i will only go 5 mins over the edge and keep something back to stop myself doing anything..thanks for the support :pinkrose: