Friend wants suicide; Can I not comfort?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by AfraidofMyself, May 9, 2007.

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  1. Long story short: My friend has posted MySpace blogs about committing suicide soon. She's posted them a few times and one evening I actually drove to her house, freaking out that I may lose a close friend. I came to comfort her and I felt like she threw it in my face (thus making my suicidal want worse).
    I told her that the guy she's wanting to kill herself over was really not worth it and that he had treated her badly. She agreed and later she was talking about how she always gets with the bad guys. I had her to calm down and she was just talking about experiences she had with people. She said something to the affect of, "...even my friends are losers. I only have the loser friends because they can't be friends with the popular kids so they settle for second best--me..." I blew it off like I didn't hear her (though she talked about it for like 5 minutes) but driving home I felt pathetic.
    I just felt like trash. I'm worthless to her? Driving to comfort her at 11 at night was not enough to show friendship? Am I really that much of a loser?
    Well, a few weeks have passed and she's calmed down with the suicide.
    Today I log into MySpace and find she's posted ANOTHER blog saying that after this weekend she's going to do it.

    I'm in a terrible situation now. I do not want her to harm herself but I do not want to be belittled any more by her. I fear reaching out to her now. I don't know how to handle this issue now.
    She actually threw me into depression a little deeper for a little while--it really hurt that she said that, especially with me sitting right there.

    What do I do now? :dunno:
    I can't just leave this issue alone and say I hope she doesn't do it...but I can't just shove myself in that predicament again where I'm pushed into a dark suicidal hole.
    It's like I'm either giving to her and taking from me or taking from her and giving to me. Do I want to be alive and well or do I want her to be alive and well?
    Suggestions anyone?
     
  2. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    i know it's going to sound crazy my saying this but don't take any derogatory remarks from her to heart. she is not in the right state of mind herself. i think when we're all like that we all say things that just aren't right. sometimes out of our sadness we lump everyone into one shell when really that is not the case. i want to totally assure you that you are not a loser. don't take on her point of view cause it's just not true. a true friend will do what they can to help just like you did.

    if you are really concerned for her safety annoynomously tell someone in a position of authority. and give them her space addy. or take another chance not taking to heart what she saids derogatory towards you and just know it's her illness speaking.

    i am not sure what more to tell you, but no matter i absolutely hope for the best for you in this situation. whatever you decide is meant to be. please take care
     
  3. make_me_bad

    make_me_bad Well-Known Member

    By giving her what she wanted (your visit), you awarded her in her quest for attention. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I don't think I know anyone who's never sought attention - but if she's going to be emotionally ignorant toward you when you selflessly give it to her then just don't bother. Chances are, after seeing that you'll come back even after she's treated you like shit, she'll just be even more blunt next time. Based on my own speculation, with no offense meant toward your friend, from what you said it sounds like she has no intention of harming herself. Seriously, MySpace blogs? I used to use MySpace, those are publicly viewable are they not?
     
  4. TheBLA

    TheBLA Well-Known Member

    Well, you can make it private so that only people you want as your friends can view it.
     
  5. Freddy

    Freddy Guest

    If its serious enough and you love your friend alot you might have to call emergency services.

    Sometimes people really dont mean the things they say.
     
  6. Is your friend okay now, AoM?
     
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