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Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Keno, May 23, 2009.

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  1. Keno

    Keno Member

    So I just found out people who I thought were close friends for years are not what they seem, it makes me depressed and paranoid. Does friendship mean nothing to people, how can I trust anyone?
  2. Ziggy

    Ziggy Antiquitie's Friend

    When I was at University, my mate was really popular and I was dead envious of him because I wasn't. Of course when he went through a rough patch they all deserted him like rats leaving a sinking ship. Difficult times. But these were times when I wanted to be popular in a shallow, superficial way, yet ended up really learning the true value of trust, loyalty and commitment.

    So can you trust anyone? I don't know. But I think you realise the true nature of friendship, and I think that's a good thing that will remain with you for the rest of your life. Hopefully it will lead to better and stronger relationships in the future. You can only wait and see.
  3. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    i don't get it either.

    i'm not much help as i feel exactly like you.
  4. *sparkle*

    *sparkle* Staff Alumni

    True friends are few and far between. Friendship means a lot to some people and there ARE people out there that wouldn't let you down. :hug: I'm sorry that you have had such bad experiences :hug:
  5. The Scream

    The Scream Well-Known Member

    sorry to hear you had a negative experience :hug:

    there are good people out there, it's just not easy to find them...
  6. Ignored

    Ignored Staff Alumni

    I'm sorry you've had such bad experiences..... unfortunately people are generally shit and always end up stabbing you in the back I'm afraid. :poo: Trust no one, that's my motto!
  7. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    I just found out that a friend of about 30 years has basically been using me for his own enjoyment, as in mocking me behind my back. Another mutual friend who just had a stroke at age 55 told me this because he said that he didn't want me to go on on thinking the other guy was my friend.

    So, I guess neither were friends. I must admit, although I've built up a pretty good defense mechanism against most other issues, like not trusting most people, this one floored me.

    So aside from SF ( I think I joined just before this all happened), I really don't have any other friends. But the ones here more than make up for it.

    Be on guard, but you should still be able to find some new friends and trust them. Unfortunately, at my age (50's) it will be harder to develop a long term friendship. Take the knowledge you gained from the experience and apply it to the next situation.
  8. Godsdrummer

    Godsdrummer Guest

    When I was an active professional rock drummer, I had all kinds of friends. As soon as I retired, they all fell by the wayside. :poo:
  9. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    True Friendship exists. To me it's like having a brother or sister when it turns into a true/close friendship.

    I'm definitely lucky I have true friends in my life.
  10. Beautiful_Disaster_09

    Beautiful_Disaster_09 Well-Known Member

    Sadly my story is quite similar to yours. Throughtout my school life I have found it difficult to make friends and the friends I did have I was always paranoid about them. Where they just doing it out of sympathy? Do they really want to be friends with me? I had so many questions that needed answering.

    Now I am in my second to last year of school and the friends I have now are causing me so many problems. They have changed me into some very bad person who drinks too much and gets people into trouble. They have such bad influences on me but I am scared to walk away from them. I know they will make my life hell if I leave them and so I have no choice but to stay with them. I am starting to hate certain people in my group of friends for reasons which would probably sound silly.

    I just wish friendship was simple and that I could find people who accepted me and were happy to be in my company.
  11. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I'm sorry to hear that Keno.

    That's the main reason that I'm reluctant to make new friends. Afraid of being used/hurt again :dunno:

    I'm sorry I have no advice for you..I just wanted you to know that you aren't alone. You can PM me if you would like to talk, anytime xx
  12. evilperson

    evilperson Well-Known Member

    I don't really get friends, I'm a loner. Noone really wants to talk to me.

    Actually they do. I just have issues. Then again I have paranoia issues from childhood and I've learned never to attach myself to anything or anyone. Well, mostly.
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