I've been suicdal for a few months now and will probaly go through with it by the end of this year. But, I'm very indifferent about it and that's because of 'Existential nihilism'. I don't beleive god put us on this planet and helps us with our petty problems because he loves us. Most of us technicly will go to hell but man, he still loves us. I don't beleive any of us is a special snowflake with a 'soul'. That whole spirituality thing has ruined everything. Giving people fake hope and ideas, its a total farce. I do beleive we're just a bunch of chemicles that have come together and just like the phenomena of gravity, their is consciousness. Life has no intrinsic meaning or value. Also determinism states that we have no free will. Which I agree with (You choose to do something but never choose to choose to do something). So nowone is ever fully acountable for their actions. So in my opinion, in the grand scheme of things, suicide doesn't matter. It's no different than a star collapsing in on itself. I wasn't trying to be mean but I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions.