from out of the blue

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Chargette, Sep 26, 2010.

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  1. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I have felt on edge for a few days but from out of the blue this afternoon after getting up from a nap, I'm suicidal. I went out to the art studio to study Spanish before church and it hit me like a ton of bricks.

    I feel like I'm not good enough. That there is no rhyme or reason as to why I exist. I know I have God, and I'm turning to him now to help me through this. I've already told my husband what's happening with me so I'm safe.

    I just don't understand where this is coming from.
  2. Aphorism

    Aphorism Well-Known Member

    It's good that you are very aware of what is happening to you and I hope things can improve for you as quickly as they have turned.

    I'm glad you're safe with your husband, and I think what you've got to do now is take each day one at a time. Try to find something beautiful in each day. You have all of the time in the world, so take it to think--or just try to relax.

    Please don't even consider acting on those urges; think about all of the good in your life.
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Ya dam depression can hit out of the blue like that. Hope you can get a hold of doctor maybe meds need to be changed some You stay strong okay i hope you feel better tomorrow
  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Hi Vivian. I'm sorry to hear that those feelings of worthlessness keep resurfacing. You have to block them out, because you are a beautiful human being and you need to keep on living no matter how hard it gets. Having God in your life and having a loving husband is definitely helpful, because you need all the love and support that you can get. Take it one day at a time and never give up. :hug:
  5. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I had the opportunity to talk with the Pastor last night and a friend together down at the church. I have a good safety net set up.

    This morning I'm not feeling anything. I have knitting group and I'll go and be with the "girls" awhile.

    There is stuff just under the surface and I catch glimpses of it. I'm not pushing it to bring it up. I don't think that would be good. I'll just acknowledge that it's there and let it settle. I go to group on Friday.
  6. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi do sound like you have a wonderful support system, but if you feel at risk, no matter when it hits you, talk to someone, and see if you need more immediate help than group on Friday...glad you posted and please keep telling us what is going on for you...PM me if I can help...J
  7. Chargette

    Chargette Well-Known Member

    I feel crappy. I can't shake it. I can't put it into words. I became suicidal on Sunday afternoon after a nap. I'm taking my meds, people know so they can keep tabs on me, I'm staying in daily contact with God, and I practice distraction, and I'm waiting for it to pass.

    :hugs: for my brothers and sisters here.
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