Frozen (Sexual abuse trigger)

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by ThePhantomLady, Jan 15, 2016.

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  1. ThePhantomLady

    ThePhantomLady Safety and Support SF Supporter

    It only took one damn song to bring me back to when I was just 13 years old trying to deal with being raped alone because I was ashamed and I feared mum would blame me... and she did when I was 16; told me not to tell anyone... and it can still tear me apart...



    My body has frozen solid,
    My mind is screaming 'run',
    But not a muscle is twitching,
    I can barely tell my lungs to breathe...
    Half of my life has passed,
    Since then, since that time,
    And I think I must accept one truth;
    I will never forget you.
    I live my life pretending it's not right,
    That I can be just like the others,
    That I'm whole and happy...
    I'm an expert at pretending,
    And I made up lies; to hide it,
    Just in case someone wondered,
    Why I had sleepless nights,
    Why I cried myself to sleep,
    Why I ran from shadows,
    That no one else saw,
    Why I had to destroy everything you touched,
    Including my own skin,
    And still today,
    All it takes is a song,
    And I morph into her;
    The little girl I was...
    When I tried to survive you,
    When I had no one to tell,
    No one to ask...
    And why no one wants to help me now...
     
    booklovr likes this.
  2. booklovr

    booklovr Well-Known Member

    This...advice in going to say is utter piece of shit.im sure I won't follow it.but.
    The only way .the.only.way. You can now look ahead without glancing back without being sucked by that...that vacuum of terror...is by forgiving.not because the devil deserves it..this crime has no excuse...but so U can get over. This.
    U need strength .extraordinary strength and courage to be actually able to forgive for a crime so heinous. But....i know ..u can.
    Let time pass like water under the bridge and forgive for your peace.
    And then only then those demons willleave you.
    Confide...here.
    And battle on.vijay bhava(means may the victory be urs in Sanskrit).
    Yours forever
    Booklover(kriti)
     
    ThePhantomLady likes this.
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