I don't know where to turn. Everything I do turns out bad. I want to better myself and I would like to move forward in my life. Every time I try to do anything it turns out negative. How do you remain positive. It's impossible if your pass keeps coming up. I would be better off dying. Nobody wants me. I been ignored by everyone who used to be friends with me. On top of that I seem to have little prospect of finding a job. I failed my driving test 3times. Can't seem to pass it. I feel stupid. I'm not a young driver either . I lived in another country so I had a license over there. People look at me like I'm stupid or retarded I don't like that word. But I know people use it against me. I'm not thinking about my past and all the abuses that happened to me. I'm trying to live for my future and take care of my kids. It's hard to be a good role model when all they see is a mother failing at everything. That's why I think how long will this carry on. I think how long more will I continue . This failure is eating me up. I can't continue to live in this society where I dont belong.