FUCK New Year!

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by touglytobeloved, Dec 31, 2009.

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  1. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    I have nothing to celebrate about. Its just an end of a worst year in my life ever, and just a beggining of a new year that will be worse than my worst. I feel sick and cold only by knowing what day is it. It makes me feel even worse than usuall.
    Why bother living.... Why me?
     
  2. Disappear

    Disappear Well-Known Member

    I'm right there with you. Nothing to celebrate, just another year of garbage hah.
     
  3. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    God, I really don't want to be here...

    I was supposed to go in to do some work- but I canceled. I don't want to do anything today.
     
  4. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    I always hate new year's. Everyone is out there happily celebrating and I'm always stuck in my room, alone. I have nothing to celebrate and no one to celebrate with. I just have my family and I don't get on that well with them.
    And I miss my ex-boyfriend so much, having reccently broken up with him. He was the only one I had and now he's gone.
    Fuck today.
     
  5. Crue-K

    Crue-K Well-Known Member

    Its amazing the number of people who don't care for New Year celebrations, myself included. As if anything is actually going to change, it doesn't because life is shit, we don't live, just exist. There is no way I can get out of tonights party, I just wanted to stay in and play Modern Warfare.

    Happy New Year? Fuck that.
     
  6. orangejulius

    orangejulius Well-Known Member

    I've always viewed NYE, or any celebration as a good excuse to meet up with and talk with family and friends. I'm not much of a "party" guy, but I try to never miss a chance to get out, because when I do, it makes me feel a whole lot better.

    As much as I wish I could be a total loner, (I know it would be easier) I just can't handle being alone for very long anymore.

    It's not as bad as all of you think. I hope all of you have a great day... :hug:
     
  7. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member

    I'm going to post some of my music in the coffeehouse forum a bit later today as my newyears gift to SF. A bit of music to pass the time-- hopefully to entertain a few other lonely souls~
     
  8. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    That sounds great :)
     
  9. L108935

    L108935 Well-Known Member

    New Years. While everyone is out partying, I'm not invited. All my "friends" get together, but NEVER tell me about it.

    woah :brett: <<This thing is freakin awesome.

    I feel bullied and lonely. No wonder why the statistics are so high on holidays.
     
  10. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    I say we kick the shit out of 2010 and not let it kick our asses...get it before it gets us and fight this crap called depression and suicide...
     
  11. Programvare

    Programvare Active Member

    I am with Bambi. Think of it as an opportunity to make a change and do something new. I know I sound like a fool, but we must fight towards it. And please don't give up, please don't do it.
     
  12. ODIECOM

    ODIECOM Well-Known Member

    for me,
    this year was a crappy year ... in the beginning and the middle. it ended better than i could have wanted. it did, through things that happened, ppl that i met and most of all ... because i chose to KEEP MOVING FORWARD.

    its not always easy to picture us stepping out our box, but until you do, you cant blame ANYONE but yourself.

    i have my moments but im glad that they dont last like they used to.

    find the key that fits and make it unlock your life.
     
  13. orangejulius

    orangejulius Well-Known Member

    So true Odiecom. It is difficult to get out of that box, but when you do, it makes life so much better, you'll almost forget what it was like before.
     
  14. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    the key broke long time ago. the spare key broke few years ago. my key is not lost, so i can find it. my key is broken. and the beggining of another year only means a beggining of new dissapointments and failures and more and more problems.
     
  15. ODIECOM

    ODIECOM Well-Known Member

    my key was broken as well, for the last 8 months. ok, for a very long time.
    what i found is, if we want change, we have to change first. i did and everything else followed.

    dont just sit and allow yourself to be broken.
     
  16. orangejulius

    orangejulius Well-Known Member

    EDIT: ODIE beat me to it.

    I hate to make a cheesy illustration/comparison, but when it gets to that point, can't you just change the lock?

    If what you are doing just isn't working, change it completely. There are an infinite number of choices to make. I know some things we can't change as easily, or at all, like other people, but almost everything else in our lives can be changed if we try hard enough.
     
  17. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    why you think i havent tryed?
    i did
    i even changed my personality, my behavior, so to be able to try things i wouldnt normally do. i did things i never actually beleived i can, and all that just to try and change the things on better. but nothing really worked out. over 10 years now since the first really bad things started happening. my condition is uncurable. the problem is, it wont kill me, it will just keep ruining my life till i die. so, where is the key? there is no even a door...
     
  18. cownes

    cownes Well-Known Member

    2010 has already got a hold on me, and its nto a positive one, :(
     
  19. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    Ditto on that.
     
  20. cownes

    cownes Well-Known Member

    :hug:
     
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