Fuck the system.

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by marisadownunder, Dec 10, 2008.

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  1. FUCK IT.
    I finally get my fucking life together, FINALLY. I like school for once, I broke out of my shell, had my first boyfriend, I HAD SELF ESTEEM! I liked knowing I was working for something valuable for my future and doing something for it. I reconnected with some old friends, actually ogt a social life and started going out more. I made new friends. For the first time in my life I felt NORMAL.
    Then I find out I have court tomorrow, my attourney calls me saying that it doesnt look like it's going to work out in my favor and I might be taken out of my home and put into yet ANOTHER group home for the 5th time.
    I was truant when I was 12-13 because I had no self esteem, the kids in my class would make fun of me because I had an allergic reaction which scared my skin on my face.
    I was 14 and I was put into a group home because, as sad as this sounds, I was addicted to an online game and refused to goto school.
    I turned 15 in a group home, I went to school, I can honestly say that placed helped my find myself and be okay with what I found. I've been home for almost a yea rnow, for this year I felt really good.
    I've slipped up a few times, I've skipped a couple days with friends, but not NEARLY as bad as it was before.
    My grades suck, I missed out alot in the past 4 years, so I'm getting tutoring and trying to help myself. I don't see WHY they have to do this to me? I mean what have I done that's so wrong? Why me? I turned 16 this past week, and ever since then life has been going down hill. My self esteem sucked, my boyfriend broke up with me, a few girls in school have been fucking with me but it was nothing major until now. Now this. I CANT do it anymore. I spent 2 years in hell, and I'm not wasting anymore of my life.
    I'd rather be fucking dead then going through that shit. I really would..
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hi, Marisadownunder,

    I'm sorry it's been so stressful and difficult for you! The good thing is that you've worked hard and turned things around. That's something to be proud of!

    It would be sad to see you give up now. I'd wait and see what the court has to say; you never know, it might be all right because you have been doing well. And you've done well in spite of the hard things you faced.

    Hold on to the ground you've gained. Stay safe! :hug:
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