Full of pure hatred

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by cnc536, Nov 28, 2015.

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  1. cnc536

    cnc536 Member

    I hate everything about my life...I hate the stress I get from school, I hate being short, I hate how I look; I hate every person on earth and especially women because I have been maltreated by them my whole life and can see that they are nothing but succubi continually looking for the bigger better deal while simultaneously screaming like children about being oppressed, which is incredibly laughable considering how utterly worthless they make me feel. Probably going to end it all pretty soon, especially if things don't get better after obtaining my degree.
     
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  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi there and welcome to the forum. Fair play to you for releasing your thoughts and feelings here, that's a good step,a s good sign. I think you need to see a psychiatrist if you're not already seeing one. Professional help is really the way forward! Is your self esteem and confidence low? I hope things do get better for you after your degree, just out of curiosity what are you doing a degree in?
     
  3. cnc536

    cnc536 Member

    Already got a psychiatrist, already saw multiple counselors, already on medications. Nothing helps because they just feed you the same old garbage, just telling you to feel good anyway even when everything is absolutely terrible. Being made to feel inferior by everyone all the time cannot be overcome, that's just how it is, I can't change my height or what I look like.
     
  4. cnc536

    cnc536 Member

    I'm going to kill myself it's just a matter of when, already tried several times in the past and this time I intend to complete it.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 28, 2015
  5. Thauoy

    Thauoy Well-Known Member

    Except for height, a lot of what you say is similar to me. Please keep posted and share your grief with us.Best wishes.
     
  6. Unknown_111

    Unknown_111 Forum Buddy Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome to the forum. I appreciate that you might hate everything about life but but don't let hold you back. We all hate things but sometimes the power of hate can take over our lives and it's an emotion that's difficult to control.
    Be proud of what you are. It does not matter what you look like but what counts on the inside. Like, you I have been screwed by many people but I tend to say sorry and walk away. Sometimes you need to learn from the hurt you feel and become the better person. You deal with hurt a day at a time but try to remain strong.
     
  7. cnc536

    cnc536 Member

    Appreciate the attempts at help there, but honestly Unknown you must not know what it's like to feel this level of hatred toward literally everything. I can't control it and I know if I had access to firearms something terrible would have already happened by now to the public just like in the States every week. How can anyone be proud of themselves when they're harbouring those kind of thoughts? I would gladly murder scores of people because of how terribly society makes me feel on a daily basis. Everyone is my enemy in my mind and I fake most of my emotions in conversation just to be able to function unless I'm flipping out about something.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 29, 2015
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