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Funny How Things Turn Out

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I have had clinical depression for 13 years now. I have medication, and good back-up from my GP and Psychiatrist, but occasionally things get so bad that my thoughts turn to suicide. I joined this Forum because in my naivety I thought I might find tips on how to exit this life painlessly, or even a buddy system where you pair up with another person intent on suicide so you can go together rather than alone.

I've now realised that this Forum is not about those sort of things at all, but reading through members posts has made me realise that I was just thinking of me, me, me - and that there are people on here facing far worse in their life than I am.

I also found myself wanting to offer advice and support - not what I intended to do at all.

Thank you all - I don't know if I'll be a member for long, but being on here albeit for a short while has helped me.


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We are all here to support each other and I'm glad it has helped you a bit. Why not stay and share a part of you as well? Everyone has just as much right to feel what they do. No matter the reasoning. We can't compare ourselves. I hope you stay and maybe find some good people who will be supportive of you as well. Take care :hug:


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JP'sMum. I agree with what Dragon_Blood has said. You have every right to feel how you feel. It is not a competition to see who has had the worst life on here. I am glad that so far this site has helped you a little and you have felt that you can give advice. That is a positive. Perhaps you would like to share some of your story, so we can help you like you have helped others. We are here to support each other and fight our demons together.
I was always a happy chld, and a happy wife and mother too :)

However, in my forties all sorts of things happened, I lost my Mother-in-Law to cancer, and I was very close to her, loved her a lot. Then we moved, and during all the upheaval of moving I started the menopause, my oldest son started dabbling in drugs, and both my father and brother died. I went into what the mental health professionals call a ''crisis''. Apparently I was found sitting behind the wheel of my car bawling my eyes out because I couldn't remember how to drive it! I'd blanked out totally.

I had a few months in a very good Hospital, but came out dependant upon anti-depressants and sleeping tablets.

Don't get me wrong, I have really good days when I love being in my garden pottering about, or having the family over for lunch, and everybody in my little village thinks I'm OK as I'm the dogsbody on a lot of committees - well they call it being the Honorary Secretary, I call it being the dogsbody!

My meds work the majority of the time, I'm on a seratonin replacement therapy callaed paroxeteine. Plus zopiclone for sleep.

But there are days when I don't want to get out bed, when everything seems futile, when I seriously think about suicide. I can't tell my husband, he was very upset when I was in Hospital all those years ago, so I try to hide how I feel.

Offloading on a forum like this one is good, it's sort of anonymous so I can get stuff off my chest.

Thanks for being there.
it might upset your husband to tell him what is going on, but you can't really be close to him if you are hiding something that important

I think that if you have a distant and superficial relationship with someone, they don't want to know about bad things that are happening in your life

If your husband is caring and supportive though, you may be hurting him worse by not telling him about what you are really feeling

are you getting therapy now? grief counseling may be helpful

I'm sorry that you lost so many people that were close to you. I think that the people that you loved would want you to get better, and wouldn't want their deaths to be the cause of such suffering in your life

meditation, exercise, and dietary changes might help you

I also recommend trying acupuncture and chinese herbal medicine

If the home in your avatar is where you are presently living, you might want to sell it and move into a more modest estate.

You may want to give me half of the proceeds in gratitude for my brilliant advice. :)

you were once a happy person, and I think that you can become a happy person again.
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