FYI for you 'forever alone' types

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by perry_mason, May 4, 2012.

  1. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    if you have a family, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, friends, etc don't whine about having nobody coz its bullshit ok and i don't want to read it.

    ok, you might be having problems or whatever but you are not alone, you don't know what being alone and single is like so stfu ok!
  2. noPoint

    noPoint Well-Known Member

    FYI if you knew the crushing feeling of having it then losing it maybe your views would change.
  3. kmj221

    kmj221 Well-Known Member

    You may not always be alone but you definately can feel alone. Please be more respectful.
  4. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Sometimes, even when you have people in your can still feel alone. Most of my friends and family haven't been very supportive or understanding, so it can seem like I don't really have anyone to rely on.
  5. Damask

    Damask Well-Known Member

    I don't know, maybe they are saying this BECAUSE they have experienced this?
    perry_mason likes this.
  6. gloomy

    gloomy Account Closed

    "It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."-Alfred Lord Tennyson

    I've been in relationships (last real one was probably in high school, and I'm almost 34 now) and I can say for sure that this is true… I know I'm not the person I was and that the people around me are not the same either, and in some ways I feel like maybe I'll never get back to the point where anyone will ever accept me.

    And even though people in relationships just take it for granted, every time you get into a relationship, you are validated. Just getting into one says 'yes, there is someone out there who will accept you, and thinks you have value, and is willing to spend time with you'. If you've had one then you feel like there's probably a good chance that you're at least somewhat functional or appealing and you can get into another one eventually… that's why you have people who are in/are between relationships coming onto this forum with ridiculous advice or hollow reassurances like 'you'll find someone eventually' or 'just be yourself', etc.

    Now imagine NOT having that at all. Imagine having so many doubts about yourself and your place and your 'normalcy' and your ability to connect with others that you can't bring yourself to even enter a relationship where there's a chance to. You actually avoid it or put people off because you don't know how to deal with it. You're ashamed… and every time some asshole comes on and acts like it's the easiest thing in the world or like it's something that always happens to everyone , you feel even more ashamed. You're ashamed that you're a virgin in the middle of hypersexualized culture. You're ashamed that you've never kissed a girl, or that you get so nervous around the opposite sex that you can't breathe, or end up saying things that just put them off, or end up pushing them away because you just can't stand the thought of anyone ever getting close to you and finding out. You hate absolutely everything about yourself, and no one is there to tell you otherwise.

    You have to work and struggle so hard just to have a little bit of human contact, but it never goes anywhere and the second you stop working on it people just abandon you… or sometimes they just tell you to get away from them.

    Even if you've just had one relationship a long time ago, at least you have that memory… is it really so hard to believe that other people have lived entire lives filled with nothing but rejection, self-doubt, shame and self-hate?

    Maybe if you're in a really abusive relationship then you have it worse, I don't know… but yeah, when you're in a relationship and you're taking it for granted I can see how it would piss off the forever alones.
  7. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    im not disrespecting anyvody ok.
    i know you can feel alone but my point remains, if you have a family, friends, etc you are not 'forever alone' end of!

    may be instead of looking at my post in a negative way, think about how it could be positive.
    if you have people in your life even if you feel alone, try talking to you friends, husband, wife etc and you might get suppport.
  8. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    exactly. if the user read my previosus posts before making their snide comment they would realize i nearly had it but lost it all.

    and im sure lots of others are the same too.

    im sorry but hearing people whine about being 'forever alone' because their friend didn't call them back within 10 minutes or instantly reply to them on facebook or didn't socialize with them for one day pisses me off.

    try really having nobody and then we will talk about you being 'forever alone' ok

    disclaimer - am i drunk so im ranting anyway but that shoudlnt take away from the point of my post i hope. (yep normal people go out with friends, im sittiing in my room on my own on a saturday evening getting drunk again)

    edit - well said gloomy
  9. Growing Pains

    Growing Pains Well-Known Member

    You are assuming these 'types' haven't tried that. What if they have tried it so many times that they're exhausted and just sick of trying? The keyword in your own statement is "might".

    "Never judge a person until you have walked a mile in his shoes."
  10. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    i m not assuming

    i was giving advice .

    i dont know people situaitions, im not a mind reader. im just saying there may be help if they have friends etc even if they think they ar e 'forever alone'. if they are sick of trying or feel helpless or whatever, that may suck but that still doens't make them 'forever alone' .
  11. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    i sorry i prety drunk so you best ignore me everyone.

    im obviously talking nonsense.
  12. Moat

    Moat Banned Member

    If you do not want to read it, then do not click on the post, it is as simple as that and even simpler to turn away and not post such a bad spirited thread aimed at people who do feel that way.
    As KJM said, be a little more respectful, because while you might not understand the feelings some are going through, does not mean that the day will not come when you find yourself thinking the same thing and asking for a little help.
  13. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    it is not a post, it is just people in general who whine about being alone when they are not.

    and im not desrespecting anyone so give it a rest. (if peopel feel 'disrepected' then maybe they should take your advice and not click on my thread ok!)

    and how do you know what im going through or what im am thinking - you don't so stop being so presumptious ok.
  14. BrinkOfExistence

    BrinkOfExistence Well-Known Member

    There's a difference between being alone and feeling alone. if people say they feel alone yet have friends and family around them, then there are probably suffering from loneliness which is often associated with depression, it's sounds like you are alone which is obviously going to cause loneliness. I know it must be upsetting to read about people feeling alone when they have people around them, if you have no one (physically) but they can't help how they feel and they have every right to express that. Also loneliness is a subjective experience, which means you can't tell people not to whine about, well you can but don't expect people to be happy about it, also a little advice about giving advice be nice about it and don't tell people to 'stfu' because they are definately not going to listen to you, i know you're drunk but that doesn't excuse you for being rude to people.
  15. Moat

    Moat Banned Member

    Well said.
    Also, while I thankfully do not use it very much, the 'ignore user' function comes in very handy at times like these.
  16. gloomy

    gloomy Account Closed

    Feel alone + not alone = 1 alone.
    Feel alone + is alone = 2 alones.

    I don't know if I agree with the way he said it, but having someone is always better than not having anyone… even if you're too depressed to realize it.
  17. mulberrypie

    mulberrypie Well-Known Member

  18. perry_mason

    perry_mason Well-Known Member

    well cry me a river!

    you have missed the point entirely.

    and i didn't tell anybody specific on here to STFU so give it a rest.

    edit - and don't bother replying, if you don't like it, get off this thread.
  19. noPoint

    noPoint Well-Known Member

    Why would I research your posts? And if you lost somebody how can you make this post? So FYI you don't know what it's like to be alone either. b e z