Hey, Everyone. Well, to be honest with you all never in my life did I think I'd end up here. About 7 months ago I was diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder, and Panic Disorder. I was starting to develop problems with my stomach due to me being constantly anxious. The doctors decided to put me on Anti-Depressants. I've never been depressed in my life. I have always been the person saying to themselves, "Why would anybody kill themselves". I've always wanted to live a long beautiful life and have been excited for the future. The first Anti-Depressant I tried was Celexa. It was awful, It had my mind everywhere! I didn't even feel like I was human. About 5 days in I had to quit! It was bringing very bad thoughts into my mind that I was not particularly fond with. The Doctor then wanted me to try the Anti-Depressant 'Effexor". This seemed to work for about 6-7 weeks. I was very uplifted and always had energy. Then, A big wave of depression and laziness hit out of no where. I couldn't get myself out of the slump and the stomach problems were still continuing. SOO, I decided to get off of this Anti-Depressant without telling anyone. I was fine! I went cold turkey for about a week with no problems at all. My Psychologists recommended that I try the anti-depressant 'Zoloft'. So, I hopped on it thinking that this one would finally work and I'd no longer be anxious or have stomach issues. Well, the stomach issues were getting a little less painful, but my mind just wasn't right. The laziness started to kick in big time! I found myself always being bored and never wanting to do anything with friends. I was getting pretty depressed and didn't really know what else to do. I started smoking (abusing) weed for about a month. I was stoned all day every day for a month. That leads me to today. I decided to quit the Zoloft about 4 days ago. I was feeling too depressed on it and needed to get away. I know it's not smart going Cold Turkey off of Anti-Depressants. I decided I was going to clean up my act, so I threw out all of the lighters, bongs, and tools for weed. Today is the day that I'm going to start getting better (At least this is what I keep telling myself). I'd much rather go back to the way I was living with some Social Anxiety problems then being constantly depressed. Today I will start my work out regimen and prepare my body and mind for college. I can't be hours away from home with the depression that I was facing here. I've heard that reading the effects of what Anti-Depressants can do to you if you quit cold turkey can actually give you the effects just from more or less a Placebo effect. BUT I have been more depressed than usual. I am getting some suicidal thoughts. They seem to be always on my mind and I just can't escape it. I really don't want to go back and start taking Anti-Depressants again or even just start taking a lower dose to ween myself off. I want to be sober, So I know the stuff is out of my system. I want to clean up! I don't want these thoughts in my head, and I realize now that it's the medication that's doing it to me. I need support to make it past this time that I'm going through. I didn't really know where else to go. I couldn't really tell my parents or friends the situation that I'm going through without a total freak out or judgement. Today is the day that I start getting back my 6 pack abs and 300lb bench press. I want to do this. I will do this.