For those of you who read my welcome thread... here's my problem. for those who haven't... here it is anyway. Video games have been one of the main fuels of my life. If i was bored, it was straight to the games. If I was depressed or had no one to talk to, then it was on to the games. You could say it became my own 'paradise' because I could simply go down to the basement and there it is. I didn't need to call anyone and ask if they wanted to hang out just to find they are too busy. Because of video games, I wasted at least a good 5 years of my life on it (sad huh?). Because of video games, I became anti-social, and have very few friends. I hate myself for being anti-social. I hate the fact that I made that poor choice to give away 5 years for my own entertainment. It's disgusting. I WANT to have a life. I WANT to have a good career, and settle down with a family (btw I'm 15). Yet, I'm not able to talk to someone, and everytime I try, they give me weird looks and distance themselves from me. Then I become depressed... and go to video games to be happy again. Then I am reminded in my head that I am wasting my time on a video game when I could be training for cross country, or improve my drawing skills... etc. And yet I don't want to do anything BUT play games. It leads me to even worse depression. I forget how I even convinced myself to stay happy. Gah... >.< I want to change... so bad. Even though some people tell me I have time, it always seems too hopeless because I've tried for so many years and I see no positive results from what I've done. That's where the thought of suicide came up in 7th grade, 3 years ago. :cry: And no, I don't want to commit suicide now. I want to end this cycle of depression, and get on with my life. Thanks for reading my post.