Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by GS9, Jan 5, 2009.

  1. GS9

    GS9 The Lost Boy

    No Health, Dental, Car, or any insurance

    Rent is 100$(200$ a month) every pay check and that about more than half my paycheck
    Bills is the other half

    I was paying 100$ every month but now they doubled it
    which is doing it dent on me

    I'm living with my aunt and uncle but they doubled my rent and its been iching at me

    They say im family but i feel more like they are my land-lords and i am the renter

    Now that the holidays are over, my hours are cut and my paycheck is shorten

    I smoke about a pack to a pack and a half a day cause of the stress

    My mom lied to my aunt and told them i paid off the collection agenticy
    which i still owe them 70$ and 62$ to reinstate my licences and 20$ to transfer my licences to a ohio one and renew it

    and i paid off the 175$ speeding ticket which did a number on me

    I have to borrow money from my co-workers inorder to eat

    My family dont understand me and they raised the rent because of how much money i made over the holiday....

    And arent going to lower it

    I feel like theres a 500 pound brick on my heart

    I lost my other aunt 2 weeks after thanksgiving

    Every day i hope to die some way, hit by a car, shot, slip and crack my head open, any way in fact i thinking about the ways i could die

    I promised myself i wouldnt comit suicide but i still think alot about ways i could die and just waiting to die is how i feel
  2. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    That's pretty inconsiderate of your aunt and uncle to raise your rent just because over the holidays you made more money than unusual.
    I presume you have spoken to them about this issue and their not budging on this.

    Is there anyone else in the family, like another aunt, uncle or cousin that could help you out?
  3. Rosenrot

    Rosenrot Forum Buddy

    The average price for a studio apartment where I live, 1 bedroom 1 bathroom, is about 700$.

    I don't know what it's like in ohio, though..

    It is inconsiderate of them to raise your rent just because you make more. What's the point of even making the money then, just to give it away? I'm sorry you feel this way, I hope things improve for you soon.
  4. GS9

    GS9 The Lost Boy

    I'm very stressed and they EVEN know how stressed out i am

    7 people were fired from my work, even my manager
    And I feel so alone, i dont even have a room and i cant have friends over

    and smoke 2 packs a day, and its like death would be more peaceful than life,

    I dont even have money or insurance to get my medication
    For my stress, anxiety, and depression


    SOooooo much has happened last year and I cant move on

    My dad cheated on my mom and left her for some girl at work when i was in the service

    I never had the support i needed to make it in boot camp

    I left the army lived in a foreclosed house then went up north to ohio
    Had Soooo much stress and no longer had the medication the army gave me to deal with the stress

    None of my family understood me and instead of helping me they sent me back to florida to no home, no jobs, nothing, it was like i was no longer a family member

    Went to live with my mom's friend but with the stress of everything i was kicked out cause my car was stolen from me

    With no car and no home i moved in with my friend and my friends dad

    Then there house foreclosed and i left to ohio

    Lived with a internet friend then found out while i was in the basement that they all hated me and were kicking me out

    i didnt sleep all night and things got heated and he choked me and threw me across the kitchen

    Went to my aunts and they kicked me out the next day saying shit like "my son is in the 10th grade he has alot of stress to deal with"

    Went back to florida lived with my friend and my other friends dad lived there, then came up to ohio where the aunt who kicked me out twice is

    My whole life that i can recall no one understood and they still dont,
    it seems the longer i live the more far away they are

    And im so pissed at my family that the one time i needed comfort and help they didnt

    and every day i wonder why am i still alive
  5. GS9

    GS9 The Lost Boy

    And this year isnt looking any better

    And Yes i quit pot and alcohol

    But I deeply want to just drink away the problems
  6. GS9

    GS9 The Lost Boy

    I nearly want to cry,

    I was looking back at what i was diagnoised with when i was in the 2nd grade
    was then taken off in the 6th and then put back on in the 6th-7th and on the 8th grade i was in regular classes

    Emotionally Handicap

    And how my childhood was...
    Man the pain i feel when i think about my childhood,
    No support and so much anger and everything...

    Makes me wish i could just restart my life
  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    :hug: Master chad.

    I'm around if you need to talk x