I know this is wonderful place--- I have been here before... The people here are second to none in understanding and heart--- I truly love the people who are here...... But to snap back to where I am..... I'm an adult staying with my folks while I look for a new place--- I have always been the "parents of my parents" if you know what I mean. I took care of *them* when I was a kid pretty much. It has been a real burden....... My mother became an alcoholic just a couple years ago, not sure why.... My father is an atheist at age 65. I disagree with both of these things. I think a person shouldn't be an alcoholic and I also disagree with a 65 year old man being an atheist. I have always had to take care of my family......... It has been both the purpose and the crutch of my life. These people have made me insane pretty much but I wanted to help them as much as I could................. I just can't take it anymore. I eventually became an alcoholic myself because this family is just ridiculous. How can you escape a dysfunctional family without leaving/helping them? This might be a redundant question because when you care about people..... you want to help them. I have helped them way too much and now I am getting older (30)..... Ugggghh.... I feel I am so confused..... I wanted to help my helpless family but I feel I did too much and I should have just forgotten them and changed my legal name almost...... What do you think?? Thanks! P.S. I have always been the only person in my family who really was about God and all this............ My mother did raise me in the church and I think she is great for doing this.... but my life in general has been just AWFUL...... very painful.... but I *have* always believed in God.... but it has been so painful, even turning 30.... What do you think? .... I am thinking 30 years of agony is starting to be too much.... I put off a lot of my life to help my family and I thought this was the right thing to do.... so.... I don't want my life to be painful forever!!