Geoffrey Chaucer poem (by Bill Bailey)

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Abacus21, May 1, 2007.

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  1. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    Thought this was bloody brilliant:

    By the way - "blokes" are men for the non-UKians on SF :)

    " A pub joke: 3 blokes go into a pub, but in the style of Geoffrey Chaucer:

    Three fellows wenten into a pube
    And gleefully their hands did rube
    In expect-ation of revelry
    For t'was the hour known as Happye

    Great bottles of wine did they quaff
    And hade a really goode luaff
    'Till drunkeness held full dominon
    For t'was two for the price of one

    But after wine and meade and sacke
    Man muste have a massive snacke
    Great pas-ties from Corn-wall
    Scottish eggs round like a balle
    Great hams, quail, duck and geese
    They sucketh the bones and drank the grease
    One fellow stood all pale and wan [Thank you RC ;) ]
    For he was vegetarian

    Yet man knoweth gluttonye, stoketh the fire of letcherye
    Upon three young wenches, round and sly, the fellows cast a wanton eye
    One did approach with drunken wink:
    'Ello darlin', do you fancy a drink?
    Soon they caught them on their knee
    T'was like some grotesque puppetry
    Such was the lewdness and debauchery
    T'was like a sketch by Dick Emmery
    Except Dick Emmery is not yet born, so such comparison may not be drawn

    But then the fellows began to pale
    For quail are not the friend of ale
    And in their bellies, much confu-sion
    From their throats, vile extru-sion!
    Stinking foul corrup-tion came spewing forth from drooling lips
    The fettered stench did fille the pube
    T'was the very arse of Belzebub

    Thrown they were from the Whore and Trumpet
    In the street, no coin, no strumpet
    Homewardbound they must quickly go
    To that end, a donkey stole
    Their hands all a-vomit greesed
    The donkey was not pleased
    And threw them all into a ditch of shite
    They all agreed, what a brilliant night
    Last edited by a moderator: May 1, 2007
  2. RainbowChaser

    RainbowChaser Well-Known Member

    I cannot believe that you posted this :laugh:
  3. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    In a good sort of disbelieving way, or a bad way? :tongue:
  4. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

  5. RainbowChaser

    RainbowChaser Well-Known Member

    In the way of "I can't believe you got this bit wrong!"

    Wan, not one you muppet!
  6. SmilePretty

    SmilePretty Staff Alumni

    lol i love it! the video made it easier for me to understand :tongue: must be because i am american haha
  7. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    Ooops! :rolleyes: :tongue:
  8. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Joe, you are a hoot!!!:biggrin: :biggrin:
  9. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Ewwwwwwww...but I'm laughing nonetheless :rofl:
  10. thedeafmusician

    thedeafmusician Staff Alumni

  11. simon

    simon Antiquitie's Friend

    his cd is really funny, :biggrin:
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