I havnt posted for a good 2 months, in that time I've gone missing for 6 weeks with no intention of coming back but eventually I did, no one knew if I was alive or dead as I left suicide notes. Been back about 2 weeks & it's all getting to me again, on medication, having counselling & off work sick. Have good support but I still get comfort from the fact I can do away with myself. I won't ever get over the break up from my wife. Been looking at methods so I know it's getting bad again. Guess I'm just weak minded.