getting close

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by coffee, Apr 16, 2010.

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  1. coffee

    coffee Well-Known Member

    I have to admit it. I am freaking scared.
    my hands are shaky and I am afraid that I am finally going to do it tonight. everything is prepared and I think I can really do it this time.

    1st time I've tried, I was feeling really strong. I was happy. But this time is different. I feel guilty, sad and shaky and scared that I will actually do it and hurt my family and friends.

    I am the only one who can stop this but I am keep telling myself, I just have to do it. Don't think too much, just fallow all the plans that I made.
    I know it will work for sure this time, there is no doubt about that.

    I think I feel like I still have to prepare more stuff for my family.
    But I am getting this strong feeling that I am going to try tonight anyways.

    I am freaking scared but excited too.
     
  2. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

    Don't know what to say, just wanted you to know that I care :hug:
     
  3. lhmac

    lhmac New Member

    I think your post showed that you are crying out for help. Please dont take any steps tonight, and if you do take a step, make it a good choice, I dont know what country your from but make a phone call now to a help line, a sucide helpline and chat to some-one now. I hope you have a good support system both medically and personally, you will need it right now. And when tomorrow comes, pack a bag and take a trip somewhere, even for the day, to the beach, to the park.

    Google helplines now.
     
  4. DreamReaver

    DreamReaver Well-Known Member

    just try to get through the rest day/night, try to keep your mind occupied with other things, anything.

    :hug:
     
  5. 8125

    8125 Well-Known Member

    you have some doubt, make that be enough to stop you tonight
    please get through
     
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