so im trying to get through the side effects of stopping effexor. before the pills i was desperate to try anything to help my depression. it made things worse and now that im weening off of it everything is 50 times worse. i went to the hospital 2 days ago because i couldnt even walk cause of how severe thew dizziness was. it felt like i was falling through the floor or someone was throwing me up into the air. all the hospital did was take tests to see if im sick and im not and gave me some ativan. i still can barely eat or drink. but i know i have to. i lost about 6 pounds. they said it would take about a week to get out of my system. ughhhhh everyday IS getting better. but its just not fast enough. i feel so useless. its finally nice out and i cant even do anything because i feel sick and tired. all i do is cry now. i dont want to die now i just wish the pain would go away. and having emetephobia makes this worse. the only thing im living for is my boyfriend. i have been sooooo attached to him lately. because he is the only one that can really calm me down. i just hope he isnt mad about me being clingy. i just feel so bad that me and him cant go anywhere and do normal things. i feel like such a failure. and whenever i go through these crisis' i always remember the memories like i cried my eyes out right there or i almost fell down right there and ill always remember it. then i have nightmares about it. im so scared about the future. i want to have sucessful jobs and relationships with friends and my boyfriend. but idk if i can do it. why did i have to go through this? god already knows ive been through hell and back and that i cant handle it. just why me? im soooo miserable physically and emotionally, sure i have gotten somewhat better in the last few days but what is the future going to be like? i just dont even want to think about it because i just burst out in tears. ive been thinking of hurting myself, to maybe make people notice that i cant do this. that im not faking it. i am miserable. idk what to do anymore =/