Getting worse again

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Jade24, Oct 16, 2016.

  1. Jade24

    Jade24 Member

    I wrote this a little bit ago hoping it would help my boyfriend understand how I was. It didn't, but at least I'm still here I guess.
    A***
    No matter how much they care
    Nothing they say will take the pain away
    All the care and empathy in the world won't cure my disease
    A toxic mind virus
    The effects felt every day
    Nervous morning
    Terrified of all the possibilities
    The voices don't help
    They tell me what people think
    They hate me
    They think I'm annoying
    They want me to leave them alone
    I should
    It all makes sense
    I understand
    Nothing is going right
    I thought I was doing okay before
    But now once again I'm drowning
    I'm so tired
    I just want to give up
    What is even worth it
    Certainly not myself
    So why am I still here
    I should just relax
    Stop thrashing in the water
    And just silently fall to the bottom
    No more screaming
    Never another line on an arm
    No more pain
    Quiet, cold but comfortable
    No last breath
    Just an end
    "So long and good night"
     
    Fracta likes this.
  2. bequietanddrive

    bequietanddrive New Member

    I can relate to this very well. I hope you are doing OK right now.
     
    Jade24 likes this.
  3. Jade24

    Jade24 Member

    Thank you, I'm not doing that great. But I'm making it for the time being
     
  4. bequietanddrive

    bequietanddrive New Member

    Same here. One day at a time for years. I want something more, but for now I'm still here. I really hope you stay.
     
    Jade24 likes this.