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Give me a sign

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by Icey, Dec 25, 2009.

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  1. Icey

    Icey Active Member

    Hey all, the name's Breanna... but I hatehatehate that name so call me Icey.

    And here are some things you should know about me:

    + I've been depressed as long as I can remember and have attempted suicide more times than I can count. Most of them I chickened out last minute though because I'm a wuss. Others just didn't work right.
    + I'm not happy I lived through them, nor did they change my point of view on life ~*~magically~*~.
    + I'm very bi polar in personality. Never been diagnosed but I go from one extreme to the next. Right now I'm being very cynical and depressed, but tomorrow morning I'll be back here all sugar-happy-peppermint-candy-canes.
    + I'm an artist. I draw furries. If you don't know what they are DON'T look it up, you'll find completely incorrect meanings. Just ask really. But check my work out here: http://ripfectious.deviantart.com . Also, I'm so insecure about my artwork that just this morning I was going to burn every last paper. Glad I didn't.
    + I'm bisexual and I'm currently dating my girlfriend of three years. Unfortunately she's just as unstable as I am so I have no idea how we've made it this far. Though I love her more than anything and I'd hate to see her gone.
    + I'm overemotional.
    + I'm a masochist.
    + I'm music obsessed.
    + I have too many friends who all have too many problems. So I spend every waking hour worrying over them. I'd give anything to take their sadness away, even if it meant making myself hurt worse.
    + I don't trust anyone. I just recently started trusting my girlfriend if that means much.
    + My life has been a never ending story of nothing but weirdness and angst. And by weirdness I mean I saw a chicken walking down the street today. Not kidding. It was amazing. And angst, well that's self explanatory.
    + I'm a bit of an attention *****. I love the spotlight, but in the same sense I don't care if the spotlight involves more people than just me.
    + I have a perfection complex. Everything needs to be perfect. I need to be perfect. I can't be human. I can't be flawed. My friends say that the only recent I'm not perfect is because I worry about being perfect too much lol!
    + Every school I've ever gone to has said I needed psychological help, unfortunately my parents think "MY DAUGHTER CAN'T BE NUTS" and so I've never gotten any. When I turn eighteen, though, I'm planning on diving in. With what money, I have no idea, but I'll find some.
    + The only things I live for are my girlfriend, my pets, and music.

    This is probably the first time I'm really reaching out on my own will. My friends have to prod it out of me. Even my girlfriend has to beg for half an hour just for me to tell her that I'm upset over getting a B in Psychology. So... this is really a big deal to me >___<.

    Hope it helps in the least. I hate being such a burden.



    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 25, 2009
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi Icey glad you came here to get support and to vent. Lots of caring people here. Welcome:IrishDoll:
  3. AEdle

    AEdle Well-Known Member

    Welcome on the board Icey!

    Hope you`ll find the support around here...

    A mm i can give you the list which can you read and see if you`re bi-polar(i`m) ...That mean you can give a diagn. by your own with that list if you have 100% or 90%.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi Icey! Welcome to the forum :)
  5. Icey

    Icey Active Member

    Thanks for the warm welcome <3.

    And AEdle, that'd be great. Where can I get one?
  6. KittyGirl

    KittyGirl Well-Known Member


    One of my closest friends in highschool was bi-polar~ so feel free to talk to me any time if you just need to bitch! ;D
  7. AEdle

    AEdle Well-Known Member

    This is a table .

    Symptoms of mania or a manic episode include:
    Mood Changes

    * A long period of feeling "high," or an overly happy or outgoing mood
    * Extremely irritable mood, agitation, feeling "jumpy" or "wired."

    Behavioral Changes

    * Talking very fast, jumping from one idea to another, having racing thoughts
    * Being easily distracted
    * Increasing goal-directed activities, such as taking on new projects
    * Being restless
    * Sleeping little
    * Having an unrealistic belief in one's abilities
    * Behaving impulsively and taking part in a lot of pleasurable,
    high-risk behaviors, such as spending sprees, impulsive sex, and impulsive business investments.


    Mood Changes

    * A long period of feeling worried or empty
    * Loss of interest in activities once enjoyed, including sex.

    Behavioral Changes

    * Feeling tired or "slowed down"
    * Having problems concentrating, remembering, and making decisions
    * Being restless or irritable
    * Changing eating, sleeping, or other habits
    * Thinking of death or suicide, or attempting suicide.

    Oh this is other list which was written by a doctor:

    * Excessive happiness, hopefulness, and excitement
    * Sudden changes from being joyful to being irritable, angry, and hostile
    * Restlessness, increased energy, and less need for sleep
    * Rapid talk, talkativeness
    * Distractibility
    * Racing thoughts
    * High sex drive
    * Tendency to make grand and unattainable plans
    * Tendency to show poor judgment, such as deciding to quit a job
    * Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity -- unrealistic beliefs in one's ability, intelligence, and powers; may be delusional
    * Increased reckless behaviors (such as lavish spending sprees, impulsive sexual indiscretions, abuse of alcohol or drugs, or ill-advised business decisions)
  8. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hi Icey,
    Welcome to the forums!! I really liked your art!! You truly have a gift...You have joined a site where there are some very supportive people.. I hop we can help you feel more secure..Take care!!
  9. cownes

    cownes Well-Known Member

    welcome to SF :)
  10. Icey

    Icey Active Member

    Eek. Seems I have everything on that list except the sleeping patterns. I sleep waaaaay too much instead of too little. But other than that I can compare each of those to something that's been going on lately, but I couldn't really put a finger on it.


    Kittygirl- Aw thank you. That's sweet of you <3.

    Stranger1- Awww.... thanks. I hope being here will help too.

    Cownes- Thanks for the welcome :3!
  11. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to SF. I am glad you seem to have found a place to open up and share. That is taking a huge step forward. :hug:
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