The past days have been so surreal. Then today when my stepmum was here, which was something I'd been looking forward to and which meant a lot to me, It just hit me. Is this all? Will life consist out of giving up many things in order to be able to speak to those u love, only to feel lonely in the end anyway because when it all comes down to it, the only ones who are actually around, both physically AND mentally are ur pets. What's the point in all this, when u know that in the end, the things u work to achieve won't last longer than a few years. Just the thought that by the time I've achieved what I want to, in regards to job, career and family I'll have worked for that over 28 years, and I'll only have a few years to enjoy that? then why even try?