Giving up totally

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Yash, Jan 21, 2009.

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  1. Yash

    Yash Member

    Ive lost everything in the past few weeks.. and now to top it all.... ive lost my car. It failed its MOT.. and i cant afford to have it fixed.

    Ive lost the love of my life..

    and my parents dont want me back..

    what... do i do...

    i cant cope i cant keep going anymore, my heart is black and my thoughts are only of one thing.... how to end it.
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Please don't give up Yash. Maybe try making up with your parents and see if you can stay with them until you get back on your feet? I'm sure they'll let you stay if they know that you're considering suicide.
  3. Yash

    Yash Member

    no.. the last time i.. told my mom and dad.. m.. (ive never told anyone this yet.. ).. my dad slit my wrist open causing me to have 68 stitches...
  4. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Ouch. That sounds terrible. Your dad actually slit your wrists for telling him that you're suicidal? Damn. I guess telling them is out of the question. :hug:
  5. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    I'm really sorry to hear that Yash :( Please don't give up. I know it seems like the answer but if you keep positive you CAN get through this.
  6. Yash

    Yash Member

    Im just so... feeling so rubbish atm... i cant stop crying at all... T_T
  7. Shauna Lea

    Shauna Lea Staff Alumni

    Do you have any friends or other family members that you can talk to or stay with?

    If you need to cry...cry! No point keeping those tears trapped inside.

    Hang in there! :smile:
  8. mdmefontaine

    mdmefontaine Antiquities Friend

    hi. i'm sorry you are so sad. i know how it feels to lose the love of your life. i know how it is to not be able to stop crying. poor you. i wish i could just give you a 'mom' hug.

    please hang on with us. we are your friends here. everyone is so supportive. there's always someone around. let's all hang-in-together . and yes, if you feel sad and feel like crying. . . it is good to ride the waves of pain. i find that they do come in waves, and then smooth out, still hurting but more tolerable, then another huge wave. . . sometimes triggered by a thought, a song, something you see, and it nearly knocks you down. but you do just need to get back up, and when the next wave comes, hang on. . .. get on here at s.f., talk to someone here, ride the wave.

    hands on, maybe someone here will suggest a good idea on practical ways to solve your daily problems. . do you have a place to live, at all? when did you lose your love? would your mom (not your dad! ouchie!) lend you the money to fix the car? not being nosey- but i do care. take good care of yourSELF. do something nice for you, and give yourself a 'break'. do not be mean, to 'you'! :hug:
  9. Yash

    Yash Member

    Hey peeps.. i just got back from my parents...

    man.. im.. in so much trouble. Its going to cost £414, and i cant even afford to pay the £55 for the initial assesment...

    Dad turned to me today and looked down and said...

    dad: "Victoria-louise.... youve just killed your mother... shes going to have to work full time to pay this off.."
    me: " cant you work full time instead of 3 days a week? as your not disabled like my mom?"
    dad: " no i f*cking cant! im not doing ANYTHING for you,"

    And thats when he punched me square in the face... in public.. hes never done that.. hes always done it when no ones around...

    I have a stunning black eye and a broken fist... cos ive had enought.. I lashed out badly and put my dads side window out in his car. Its tore my hand and arm to shreads...

    I.. dont know that to do now...

    I miss my lover so so much, im supposed to go up tomorrow.. but i have no car and i cant travel across the country in nothing T_T

    ive never broken down so hard as i did today... everythings come as one giant wave...

    Im buryed under a ton of pressure and my heads about to explode.... i have such a bad head i cant see properly.. its all fuzzy and its pulsing in my head >.< gah >< :sad:
  10. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry to hear that Yash. You need to tell someone that he is hitting you. That isn't right and you do NOT have to put up with that.
  11. Yash

    Yash Member

    what can they do.. im not a kid anymore..
  12. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    Abuse is still abuse. It doesn't matter how old you are. You're better than that :hug:
  13. Yash

    Yash Member

    :sad: im just... guh... i dunno what i am...
  14. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    I don't know you...But I'm sure you're a wonderful person. You're having a hard time....and that is OK. You don't deserve to have someone else intentionally make it worse for you.
  15. Yash

    Yash Member

    Im not sure what to think anymore.. im pritty numb inside, im really tired all the time and i dont know why.
    I dont wanna eat either... and when i do im sick after it.. all i wanna eat is peas and mash ...

    I cant sleep... ive never been able to sleep much since i was a kid... but last night... i went to bed at 4am... and i didnt get up till 2pm... that for me.. is... wrong! im in bed by 4am and up by 7am...

    I dont get it.. whats wrong with me? im never ill.... i dont even get colds.. and now im being sick.... i dont like it.. and i cant stop it...
  16. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    It's okay. There is nothing wrong with you. You're just feeling down.
  17. Yash

    Yash Member

    Ive never been this bad that im being sick tho...

    ive been depressed since i was 7... its never been this bad...
  18. Rachel123

    Rachel123 Well-Known Member

    Just remember.....there is always tomorrow. I don't want you to give up. How old are you if you don't mind me asking?

    I got into a car accident in November and I thought it was the end for me. I pulled through though...You can too :)
  19. alle_vite

    alle_vite Well-Known Member

    yash you cant give up you have to go on living for your daughter!! your life will start improving soon you just gott find your zen!!
  20. Yash

    Yash Member

    Im 21

    I cant keep going on like this.. i keep breaking down.. im so cold.. numb... i dunno what im doing i dont understand whats going on.. i need the one person i love.. she knows what im like.. she can sort me.. she can help me.. but... shes not there..shes moving away... she doesnt want me..

    she told me she does..t hen she doesnt and ><!! i cant live without her!! shes more then my life... .shes my world.. my hope my heart my trust and my fear... shes my rope when i fall shes my unberella in the rain... shes my light in the dark and shes my soul in a cold dead body...
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