Go Fuck Yourselves!

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#1
Go Fuck Yourselves! (Strong Language)

Why am i not allowed to be me ? No i must be the gay kid that was molested as a child. I must be the arrogant snob who only cares about him. The slut who needs to put his clothes back. The desperado who needs to stop looking for love and wait for love to find him. I have to be a brother. I have to be a son. I have to live. I have to want to live. No i cant eat lots of sweets. No i cant seek the job i want. No i cant no no no no cant cant cant cant. IF IM HEADED TO HELL WHEN THEN I CANT FUCKING WAIT TO GET THERE...because no physical pain will be worse than the shit i have to go thru every single fucking day. YOU DONT AGREE WITH ME ? THEN SMILE AND MOVE ON. Stop fucking attacking me all lthe bloody type, i dont have to believe in the fucking crap you believe. I DONT WANT GOD TO SAVE MY SOUL. I dont want your fucking morals, IF I WAS YOU I WOULDNT BE ME. SCREW THIS FUCKING SHIT. I Swear to god i want to kill someone, no why one person ? I MEAN ITS MORE THAN ONE FUCKING PERSON WHO FAULT IT WAS OKAY TO HIT ME. TO SPIT ON ME. TO TELL ME TO SHUT UP. TO TELL ME I WASNT WORTH IT. TO BREAK MY HEART. TO USE ME. WHY KILL ONE PERSON ??? Afterall an EYE FOR A FUCKING EYE. I swear to god if my pain could be turned into a bomb, there would be no humanity left. IT WOULD BE GAME FUCKING OVER. And im not even allowed to be suicidal. OH GOD NO. IM NOT ALLOWED TO LIVE A HAPPY LIFE. BUT IM NOT ALLOWED TO END MY LIFE EITHER. WELL THANK YOU WORLD. THANK YOU SOCIETY. THANK YOU MOTHER. THANK YOU GOD. WITH A GIFT LIKE LIFE. WHO THE FUCK NEEDS HELL ? LET IT OUT....is the name of this forum...well lets thank fuck i dont let it out...because someone would die...and im as sure as hell it would be you before its me...

Well thanks for listening...and if you tell me your care...or give me a virtual hug...i swear to god... ^_^
 
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Entropy

Well-Known Member
#2
<Mod edit: Abacus21 - please do not insult other members>
.
.
Is that what you wanted?

.. its cool man, but im not going to fucking hug anybody... hehe.

Good fucking luck =P might want to label your posts as ultr-<Mod Edit: Abacus21 - language> offensive.

But I dont care...
 
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Entropy

Well-Known Member
#4
I didnt mean it as an insult...

It was... what do you call it... read Teardropps original post...

If teardropp took it personaly then I am sorry for that.

Maybe in public it wasnt a good place to have put it..

But still - reallity is reallity - and now I feel like this post is less about tearrdrop

Tearrdrop said they didnt want a virtual hug...

Guess we live in a dystopian world...

I am sorry you feel like trash tearrdrops, just trying to be humorous... do not fear the man.
 

helena

Staff Alumni
#6
Hi there, TDBT :)
I read your post and honestly, I wish I had the nerve to simply scream it all out the way you did...in a way it's sad because I could really feel the pain and desperation in it, but I think it sometimes is important to just forget about all the conventions and social rules and just get things out of our chest.
Society, family, our whole environment seems to have expectations, plans for us and mostly aren't the things we're asking for and it makes it hard to fullfill this expectations, if we even want to....
Is it someone specific you're angry at?
I hope sincerely that you manage to cope, maybe talk things out in real life IS an option.I don't know, probably this doesn't even make any sense, but I couldn't help myself to answer, as I was caught but the power that was coming out of it....It might be the power that will help you stay alive, the anger and will to get the things your way, no matter the expectations around you.You are a strong person and I wish you all the best :)
 

NoMotiv

Active Member
#8
I like your opinion, I like it a lot. Why the hell cant you do what you want to do? If you know what you want to do, and youre good at it, go and fucken do it? Who cares what they think, what right have they to tell you how to live your life. If you have dreams, go and chase them. Its your life, live it your way.
 
#9
Re: Go Fuck Yourselves! (Strong Language)

Why am i not allowed to be me ? No i must be the gay kid that was molested as a child. I must be the arrogant snob who only cares about him. The slut who needs to put his clothes back. The desperado who needs to stop looking for love and wait for love to find him. I have to be a brother. I have to be a son. I have to live. I have to want to live. No i cant eat lots of sweets. No i cant seek the job i want. No i cant no no no no cant cant cant cant. IF IM HEADED TO HELL WHEN THEN I CANT FUCKING WAIT TO GET THERE...because no physical pain will be worse than the shit i have to go thru every single fucking day. YOU DONT AGREE WITH ME ? THEN SMILE AND MOVE ON. Stop fucking attacking me all lthe bloody type, i dont have to believe in the fucking crap you believe. I DONT WANT GOD TO SAVE MY SOUL. I dont want your fucking morals, IF I WAS YOU I WOULDNT BE ME. SCREW THIS FUCKING SHIT. I Swear to god i want to kill someone, no why one person ? I MEAN ITS MORE THAN ONE FUCKING PERSON WHO FAULT IT WAS OKAY TO HIT ME. TO SPIT ON ME. TO TELL ME TO SHUT UP. TO TELL ME I WASNT WORTH IT. TO BREAK MY HEART. TO USE ME. WHY KILL ONE PERSON ??? Afterall an EYE FOR A FUCKING EYE. I swear to god if my pain could be turned into a bomb, there would be no humanity left. IT WOULD BE GAME FUCKING OVER. And im not even allowed to be suicidal. OH GOD NO. IM NOT ALLOWED TO LIVE A HAPPY LIFE. BUT IM NOT ALLOWED TO END MY LIFE EITHER. WELL THANK YOU WORLD. THANK YOU SOCIETY. THANK YOU MOTHER. THANK YOU GOD. WITH A GIFT LIKE LIFE. WHO THE FUCK NEEDS HELL ? LET IT OUT....is the name of this forum...well lets thank fuck i dont let it out...because someone would die...and im as sure as hell it would be you before its me...

Well thanks for listening...and if you tell me your care...or give me a virtual hug...i swear to god... ^_^

I am trying to tell the truth! I didn't read any of that!


Sorry? :blink:




But |YAY| I love free hugs! :hug: :hug: :hug:
 

Tatara

Active Member
#11
I know exactly how this feels. I'm tired of hearing "its ok, you'll work it out" or "we care, we really do" or virtual hugs or other false pleasantries. While I appreciate those who try to help with these comments, some people (like myself) just don't beleive it, will never beleive it and see it as transparent when you say it.

8 years of "trying to get better", of being told I'm sick, of taking different meds that mess my brain around, of crying in anger and in sadness, of wishing there was such thing as morphene for emotional pain, of just wanting to end it, of wanting more then anything to 'turn it off', of being promised that if I stick around one day I'll be "normal", of remembering past abuse, of trying to forget past abuse? Of hating and hating and hating, of wanting to hurt myself or others, of desperation and anxiety.

dealing with this for even 3 months can be tiring, but when it goes to almost a decade? beyond a decade? We're tired! We're worn the fuck out. There really is nothing that is going to calm us anymore. Theres no line that hasn't been tried, nothing we haven't already heard in attempts to soothe us.

Its frustrating because we keep calling out for help but the help doesn't make us feel better anymore, if it ever really did. It feels completely hopeless all the time.

I have to deal with the pain alone constantly trying to beleive that it will pass.
 
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