going silent

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by among the stars, Jul 1, 2012.

  1. among the stars

    among the stars Well-Known Member

    for months i have been hiding my identity because I did not wish to hurt anyone anymore. I HATE living this life but what does it matter. If i hurt people then i should not be here and yet i have to be or else id be dead. I cant apologize enough, i cant take back whatever i did. i cant fix who i am and can only run from it for so long. so badly do i wish to speak to spill my soul out for everyone to see but i cant. if it means i suffer in silence for the rest of my life i will. i do not wish to hurt anyone person and the only way i know how to do that is by keeping silent. becoming completely invisable to everyone here. whether i am aware of it or not my words hurt people, whether my brain remembers it or not i know it happens because people hate me. I cant allow this to continue. if u see me in chat from now on i no longer exist. dont worry about me, dont waste ur time talking to me because u will only get hurt in the end and that is the last thing i want to happen. in the beginning i swore to protect you, to be there for you. to many i have broken that promise but it will be broken no more.
     
  2. MisterBGone

    MisterBGone Well-Known Member

    Are you sure you're not being overly harsh on yourself? It sure sounds that way to me! Even if you've offended a few, my guess is that you've exaggerated the destruction just a bit. And besides, you've got to remember where you are: people can be sensitive in here, so just keep that in mind... Have you thought about cognitive behavioral therapy? It may help. Otherwise, try to find a family member or friend or really almost anyone at all that you care about to share some of these thoughts with. Because keeping them shut on the inside is a recipe for disaster. Eventually, you'll explode (or implode!)! And we don't wish that on anyone... Again, try not to be so hard on yourself. And take care! I truly do wish you the best.:)
     
  3. mulberrypie

    mulberrypie Well-Known Member

    <3 you, sweetie :hug: