I am going to do it.... I am going camping this weekend.. just me and nature.. could not ask for a better place to do it at... I have given two people plenty of time to respond , even tried once and failed at my attempt.. but not this time... this time i have enough and i am gonna do it... See , i cant get a peace of mind without their cooperation... i cant come to God because that is how i was taught and to ask me to believe something totally different would be out of the question cause believing in one faith is enough.. i already had changed from second freewill baptist to church of christ and i guess i will go down as church of christ.. these emotional feelings and with the physical feelings has me hurting so much.. the pain of the cancer is increasing day after day and to top it all off with this emotional feelings and suicidal feelings i just cant do it.. i am not as strong as you and others here think i am.. im sorry but i just am not... i have given the daltons plenty of time, even broke my last times because i had a little hope , well i am not breaking it this time.. they have had plenty of time to help me ease my mind , plenty of time.. and i cant wait anymore.. i cant fight this cancer and the emotional anymore.. i just cant do it... They could not love me just enough to help me ease my troubled mind , spirit and soul.. i tried . i honestly tried. i sent letters , they came back to my address refused. waste of time and money on my part. i called the number of their home phone , it says not accepting calls at this time.. they blocked me from calling.... it is up to them now.. if they love me then they have to contact me , yet they did not.. they know where i live and my phone number, nothing.. THEY DONT LOVE ME SO I AM GONE.. THEY BOTH KNOW I WILL DO IT.. THEY DID NOT THINK I WOULD DO IT LAST TIME BUT I DID , SO THEY KNOW I WILL DO IT, WELL THIS WEEKEND I AM GONE , SORRY. I GAVE THEM PLENTY OF TIME.. could not ask for a better place then nature, just me and nature, just me and the woods... i leave tomorrow.. sorry everyone.. i just am not that strong.. i cant fight this cancer.. it is not a joke , not a lie , not a stunt for attention.. i come here because i have a troubled mind , soul , and spirit , and i tried to ease that to make peace so i could die trying to fight this cancer but appearetntly they just dont give a damn and i am gone..