going to see a counselor next week

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Ozzy Manson, Jan 13, 2011.

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  1. Ozzy Manson

    Ozzy Manson Well-Known Member

    i've had an ongoing battle with cutting for 5 years now, and i'm a freshman in high school. It looks as though i will now get the help that i need. I saw a counselor at my middle school last year against my will, they found about my cutting, forced me to tell my parents, then had a meeting with my parents about it. after that day, nobody did anything.. i saw a counselor maybe twice over the summer, but i never was able to actually stop cutting. after i saw one of my teachers last year today for a friendly visit, she asked how i'd been doing because she knew about my self harm. and after talking for a while, (and calming me down when i got freaked out about seeing somebody again) she got me to agree to see somebody at my high school if she got something set up for me. I will say that now i am kind of relieved...still kind of scared, but oddly i feel happy.

    i apologize for kind of rambling on here...but anyways, i created this in mind with asking for some opinions and help before i see this person at my school. I am concerned that they will tell my parents that i didn't stop cutting, i always feel i have to be strong for my mom, to protect her. i don't want to see her hurt again like she was when she found out. Though i do have the fact that there was a meeting held and my parental unit is aware of the situation i was in, so if they know about it, i don't really see why they would need to be notified as to my continuing of self harming behavior... i'm kind of nervous too about going in to the counseling offices because i still have bad memories of being in that situation last year. and in general i get very anxious and nervous about meeting new people... so i guess, if anybody can give me advice for my first time in there and whether or not my parents might get notified it would be much appreciated. :) and any opinions or do's and don'ts are welcome too.

    thanks in advance,
    Jennifer (ozzy)
     
  2. thepainwithin

    thepainwithin Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry to hear that you were forced to see a counselor against your will; when I was a freshman in high school (during finals week of all times) I got called down to the office and some lady tried to talk to me but all she did was call in my mom and make her cry. My mom told my dad and they got so worried about me. Since that day my life has never been the same. I feel like my parents fight everyday because of me and my mom is on tons of medication because I am putting her through hell as the problem child. It is good that you are going to see someone, I wish I would have years ago. Just recently I have started to take meds and talk to people about the problems that have been bottling up inside.
     
  3. Ozzy Manson

    Ozzy Manson Well-Known Member

    being forced into seeing her and telling my parents i think has a lot to do with why i was unable to stop, that and i didn't get help at all after that day. I think really it just made me go further away from everybody into myself, and prevented me from stopping. also you really have to want to stop cutting on your own...it doesn't really work when others try to force you to do so. I can't imagine having that happen during finals! that would just be horrible..I feel the same as you, that i am the cause of my parents fighting at home. I really felt terrible when i had to tell my mom, because she reacted just how i was afraid she would, thinking it was all her fault.. i think it will be a good thing as well, i find it hard to open up to people much but i hope to do good with the counselor. At least you are getting help now and being able talk, that feels really good i bet :)
     
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