gonna do it this time

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by daman1, Jan 16, 2011.

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  1. daman1

    daman1 Member

    I've been thinking about committing suicide for months but something has always stopped me. Today was the day I'd been planning on doing it for ages i'd planned everything Friday i'd withdrew every penny i had from the bank, wrote my goodbye letters trying to explain why i did what i did, got xxxx to make sure i would never come back but yesterday i was busy, had a good day and felt good for a change so changed my mind but today i wish i'd gone through with it.

    I've got depression and the last few weeks i've realised i've probably got severe depression because i've never felt as bad as i do before in my life and the last few weeks have been an absolute nightmare 4 me and it seem's to be getting worse and worse. I can't seem to get out of my dark moods lately and all i want is to escape from how i've been feeling the last few weeks because i'm a nightmare to be around. I try and be cheerful and happy when people are around but i'm just pretending and inside i feel empty and dead it's been mental torture and I wanna escape from it and how i've been feeling but i know the 1 person i can never escape from is myself and that's the 1 person I wanna escape from more than anything in the world and this is the only way out 4 me!

    Anyway next sunday will be my last day unless I change my mind again I'm just writing this just in case some1 has any advice on how 2 overcome this depression i'm in, i'm willing 2 try anything
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 16, 2011
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Before anyone can make suggestions, what treatment have you tried?
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    deep depression you need professional help okay you need to talk to your gp or pdoc and get meds changed get new therapy Hard depression is but with right help it can get better hugs
     
  4. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You need to go to the hospital and get on meds.. They can refer you to a pdoc when they release you..You'll get plenty of rest and therapy while in there.. You usually see the pdoc and a therapist daily.. Then they hold groups to help past the time and to teach you coping skills..
     
  5. daman1

    daman1 Member

    I've had no treatment, didn't know there was any availiable apart from anti-depression meds.
    If I got treatment how long would it be before I started feeling better?
    What's a pdoc?
     
  6. warrabinda

    warrabinda Well-Known Member

    pdoc- psychiatrist (i think).
    but seriously, i think it's jumping the ...boat to so soon decide to carry out a suicide without trying all your options!! there's a really good ebook i would rec - The Forever Decision. It's an online book and has helped me countless times.
    http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/documents/Forever_Decision.pdf
     
  7. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi sorry yes pdoc is psychiatric doctor and treatment is individualized it depends on the person how long it will take to make you feel better. there is behavioral therapy that help changes your negative thoughts to positive one destorted thoughts to more clearer ones there are lots of different therapies Talk to you doctor and get a referal okay to a psychologist one that deals with
    depression trauma okay take care of you okay it can get better.
     
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