Perhaps work is not what fulfills you. It sounds as though volunteering does to some extent. 31 years and 5 years leading groups are long-term commitments to those groups/causes. I think you'd be missed more than you might think.
What about "you for you"? Have you ever wanted to take up a musical instrument, travel, learn another language? Or anything...that you just haven't gotten around to doing. This is the time to do it. The time to reflect on what else you might like to try. It won't "make up" for the break up, but it could fill some time and give you even a small sense of purpose as you work through your grief. What would be new and completely different for you - and therefore kind of interesting? Who knows, you might discover you have a talent or passion for something. :smile:
I understand about wanting to raise a child. Not having a child with the ex was one of the big regrets I had. I don't regret it now...It would have been so much harder to move on if there was a child involved and we'd had to be in touch with each other all the time for custody exchanges and shared parenting from two homes. And damned hard on the kid...In your case, down the road, you might not have a child with someone else, if "having a child" is something you'd like to do. (I realize it might be part of what you wanted with Becky, not in general.)
I just don't like to think that you would take steps to a permanent solution to the pain that will decrease if you give it time and nurture yourself. :hug:
What about "you for you"? Have you ever wanted to take up a musical instrument, travel, learn another language? Or anything...that you just haven't gotten around to doing. This is the time to do it. The time to reflect on what else you might like to try. It won't "make up" for the break up, but it could fill some time and give you even a small sense of purpose as you work through your grief. What would be new and completely different for you - and therefore kind of interesting? Who knows, you might discover you have a talent or passion for something. :smile:
I understand about wanting to raise a child. Not having a child with the ex was one of the big regrets I had. I don't regret it now...It would have been so much harder to move on if there was a child involved and we'd had to be in touch with each other all the time for custody exchanges and shared parenting from two homes. And damned hard on the kid...In your case, down the road, you might not have a child with someone else, if "having a child" is something you'd like to do. (I realize it might be part of what you wanted with Becky, not in general.)
I just don't like to think that you would take steps to a permanent solution to the pain that will decrease if you give it time and nurture yourself. :hug: