i'm sorry ive let so many of you down. And i'm also sorry that a few of you will smile knowing i'm finally gone. But I can't take this any longer, it's been nearly 3 years!!!! how long can i keep living a lie. I'm sorry but this is it. Good bye all, I hope some of you manage to get to where you want in the end, I'm just one who wasn't strong enough, good enough. never quite good enough for any thing or any one. failed experiment, now terminated. chow.