i tried to turn my life around but i just fucked it up again, got a job then got fired like i knew i would, for something that wasnt even my fault. I now feel like im living 1 biig day that never ends, i drift through life with nothing, i used to have everything. even fucking suicide cant be done without causing a big bastard deal, things just get worse and worse and dont look like there going to stop. 22 soon, christmas coming up i dont want to be around. I wanted to die from a heroin overdose, thought fuck it i might aswell try it. my plans have changed . I plan on getting drunk and slitting my wrists. i know its well within my capabilties i just wanna get it right first time. Throughout my life i've made so many choices that have turned out to be the wrong decision, if only i could turn back time. I feel as if we all start life with the possibility to be happy but so many of us make poor judgements and choices whether to satisfy ourselves or we're greedy and it steers us down another path. A path that you cant come back from, my life is beyond repair, perhaps many of you can salvage yours, I hope you can. It's almost at the point where my anger at myself and everyone around me will boil over and i just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. If i have one peice of sound advice in my crippled mind itd be not to take drugs, which sounds disabled because everybody ignores people who say that.