Hello everyone. I went to this site to read up on some possibly helpful and cheerful stories on how to get through thoughts of suicide. I am in a very bad state now, my world is crumbling, and the only person I have ever loved for almost 6 years has left me with out so much as an explanation. I have no support group whatsoever, my family is close to useless in regards to talking about feelings, and I do not believe in professional help. I have started to give away my things now. I really love photography, but as of this coming Friday I have arranged to give all my gear to random people in a forum I frequently visit. I thought that art would be "therapeutic" for me, but it did not work. I have been in pain for 8months or so, and every night i cry uncontrollably. I am constantly hurting myself, and I have prepared an "exit bag" for myself. It is very painful to live, and my life has been a testament to that. I wish all of you a good day, and always love and smile at your loved ones. Thank you.